You Found Me!

apparently at some point when my now-girlfriend and i were flirting with each other but not quite in a relationship, she asked me how i felt about pet names, to which i replied “well you have to call them something” 

the fact that i have managed to end up in a relationship is really testament to my girlfriend’s patience 

wait

He’s speaking…

It’s only fitting that this gets reblogged today

This is the only eagle that deserves reblogging on the 4th

Someone told my ex-dad (not a sex thing; he just disowned me) that I’m trans and now he’s threatening to come to work and make a scene, and I know I should be upset, but like. What’s he gonna say exactly? And to whom? Because imagining a haggard and likely shitfaced Pennsylvania construction worker barging through the grocery store like, “HEY!!! THAT BROAD-HIPPED 5'3” EFFEMINATE KID WITH THE CONSPICUOUSLY BIZARRE NAME WHO SPEAKS IN A CARTOONISHLY AFFECTED CARICATURE OF MASCULINITY AIN’T GOT NO DICK!!! YOU GONNA BUY SCRATCH OFF TICKETS FROM SOME KINDA DICKLESS ABOMINATION??“ is wild. What’s it going to accomplish? Or is he gonna call my manager? “HELLO, I’D LIKE TO REPORT A FRAUD IN YOUR DELI DEPARTMENT. THERE IS NOT SAUSAGE AS ADVERTISED.” What the fuck.

Odds are he’s more embarrassed of having a trans ex-kid than I am of being outed at work, so what if I go to his job and tell everyone I’m trans first? What then, coward?

That’s such a power move.

Let’s hear it for 5'2", 87 year old gay men who are trans allies! Woo!

I got a lot of beef with the concept of dust. absolutely no reason for something to get dirty just because nothing has touched it. bullshit.

if my friend told me they believed they were stuck in a time loop i would simply believe them

this is why i have a time loop code, which i thought of and have never written down or spoken, all someone needs to do is tell me it and i'll know they got it from me in a previous loop

thats fucking genius

99% of all murders committed by women in ancient greek plays are completely justified

Clytemnestra: crack? Is it crack you smoke?

what if you went outside and saw slender man what would you do

tobey maguire or andrew garfield 

i thought this said spider man please ignore me