get out of my room, mom

~draped in oozing darkness~

missed you guys i'm so fucking tired but i'm here

Stolitz | 7.9k | Explicit 🔞 | Smut, fluff, humor, teasing, clothed sex, sex in the van, Stolas has a cloaca, imp anatomy, dirty talk (see more tags on AO3)

Thanks @stolitzsings for the beta help and encouragement! ❤️

Excerpt:

Showing up at the Imp City Pride Parade naked as the day he was born had seemed like a great idea when he left the house. It was his one chance to be overtly sexual and obnoxious around his friends and coworkers without getting scolded for it. After all, Pride was the event where being a freaky pervert, even by Hell’s standards, was something to be celebrated.

The moment Stolas arrived, though, Blitzø knew he was fucked.

The fishnet shirt that left nothing to the imagination. The matching earring, hair dye and eye shadow. The grabbable choker. Those fucking shorts. Christ. And Blitzø thought his ’outfit’ had been sexual. He had nothing on Stolas’ slutty-ass look. The man was literally sex on legs.

He was going to spend the whole parade hard as a rock, wasn’t he?

“Blitzø!” Stolas smiled when he saw him, trotting elegantly towards the van with those deliciously long legs of his. Via, who was by Stolas’ side, rolled her eyes at her dad’s earnest excitement and joined Loona a bit farther down the street. “Oh, I’m so delighted to be here—I’ve never attended a pride parade before!”

Blitzø leaned on the window frame and gave Stolas a look.

“Well, for a newbie, you sure know how to dress for the occasion.” He didn’t bother hiding his hunger as he gave Stolas’ body an appreciative look, his gaze lingering on those shorts that hugged his thighs beautifully. “It should be illegal to go outside looking so fuckable, you know.”

“Oh?” Stolas bent down so they were face to face. He looked so smug, the fucking flirt. “Like what you see, then, darling?”

“Maybe I do,” Blitzø said, leaning back on his seat for Stolas to appreciate his looks as well.

As expected, Stolas’ eyes widened at the sight of his naked body.

“Hmm. Likewise, I must say,” he replied, touching Blitzø’s chest right by the pan flag. He ran the tip of a long finger down Blitzø’s side all the way to his waist, making him shiver.

“Yeah?” Blitz buried his hand in Stolas’ chest feathers and, looking Stolas in the eye, trailed it up to hook one finger around his collar and pull him closer. Stolas hooted, and his feathers puffed up with delight as a flustered blush spread over his pretty face. “Bet you’ll like it even more when I spend this whole parade hard as a fucking rock because of you, you slutty, slutty bird,” he murmured, lowering his voice in that way that never failed to make Stolas shiver.

Stolas giggled, a tiny out-of-breath sound that traveled right down to Blitzø’s cock. “I’m sure I will enjoy that indeed,” he purred, leaning so far into the van that his beak practically brushed against Blitzø’s cheek.

Blitzø nipped playfully at Stolas’ neck. “Better stay close to the window to block the view,” he said lowly. “Unless you want everyone to see what you do to me, babe.”

Read the rest on AO3!

“Fuck,” Stolas breathed, burying his hands in his hair. He was shaking. There was not a feather in his body that wasn’t ruffled from pure, undiluted arousal. 

He was so fucking beautiful he barely seemed real. 

“Alright,” said Blitzø, running his hands under Stolas’ thighs to grab his ass. “Hips up, pretty bird.” 

He didn’t give Stolas a chance to process what was happening. Bending down as much as the tiny space allowed, he propped Stolas’ thighs on his shoulders and snaked his tongue out to lap at the inside of a thigh. 

When Stolas’ eyes widened in realization, Blitzø smirked and said, “The only thing that’s coming off is that pretty make-up of yours when I make you cry for it, baby.” 

Then, he lifted Stolas’ ass all the way to his mouth and worked his tongue under one of the shorts’ legs and to the edge of his slit. 

“Ffffuuuuck—ngghhh!” Stolas wailed. In this position, his knees were practically bracketing his fluffy chest, and his claws were scratching the top of the van as they curled and uncurled. The fabric of his little shorts was so distended it looked about to burst. His face was flushed starkly, and tears were glistening on the edges of his upper eyes.

He was truly a sight to behold, and Blitzø was so fucking hard from it.

Wasting no more time, he teased the edge of Stolas’ cloaca with the forked tip of his tongue, loving the obscene sounds that fell from Stolas’ pretty mouth, and that grew more and more desperate the longer Blitzø grazed the rim of his puss without going further.

It didn’t take long for Stolas to become impatient, his moans turning into cries of pure dismay.

“F-Fuck your tongue into me,” Stolas said, urgency tinting his voice oh-so-prettily, and when Blitzø raised his eyebrows at him, he added, “please. Fuck, Blitzø, please, I need you inside me, please—ahhh!”

Stolas clenched tightly around his tongue when Blitzø finally took some pity on the owl and slipped the tip inside. He lapped at Stolas’ insides leisurely, unhurriedly, enjoying both his taste and the filthy sounds that he dragged out of Stolas with every twist and twirl of his tongue.

“More, deeper, darling, please,” Stolas begged, reaching out and grabbing one of Blitzø’s horns roughly as if to will Blitzø’s tongue deeper inside him. Pleased, Blitzø decided to indulge him and drove his tongue farther into Stolas’ cunt. The shorts were pressed against his open mouth now, and he was slobbering all over them as he tongue-fucked Stolas, but that just made him harder—made his cock twitch and ache for release.

Soon, he told himself.

Interestingly, reverse image search brought up this photo, which appears to be a capture of the exact same moment, just from a different angle: 

Nepalese farmers throw mud at each other in a paddy field in Tau-Daha village on the outskirts of Kathmandu on June 29, 2010. The farmers are celebrating National Paddy Day on ‘Asar 15’ of the Nepali calendar as the annual rice planting season begins. AFP PHOTO/Prakash MATHEMA

Two more photos of continued vibe checking, also from Prakash Mathema [1] [2]

And a personal favourite from 2018 (in Lele village):