fell attwell stan account

scrunkly from my web serial

Guy who has a trigger event from getting run over reallll slowly feet first by a steamroller but the guy driving it can’t hear him screaming because he’s jamming out with his headphones on

*senses u with my swarm*

one of the most deranged things about blake thorburn is that he spent the first three arcs complaining about eating nothing but oatmeal NOT because he had no other choice but because he’d rather cry into his 20th consecutive bowl of oatmeal than “resort” to the black beans and rice that were sitting untouched in the pantry

you may think it was molly who stocked the pantry sometime before blake’s arrival, however a much funnier theory is that the day before the events of pact 1.1 rose sr went on a costco run and said “what breakfast staple could i most effectively psychologically torture my grandson with in four months time” and bought an entire pallet of quaker peaches & cream

Rose Sr made like a dozen tupperwares full of her prizewinning Thorburn Black Bean Risotto for her grandkids to eat while they settled in and then Barbarotem used his evil scissors to split it all into sinister beans and menacing rice... this is the fate that follows every diabolist

after rose senior’s death laird broke into hillsglade house and used his diabolic knowledge to direct barbatorem to cut the prizewinning risotto into its constituent ingredients. he then used chronomancy to revert the beans and rice back to an uncooked state, repackaged them, and placed them back in the pantry. can’t have shit in jacob’s bell

hey um. your boyfriend’s karmic balance was so bad that the forces underpinning reality ground him down until he became unrecognizable as the person he was before. yeah he’s made of wood now. sorry

hey also your boyfriend found a murderous fishwife while he was. yeah while he was being permanently altered on all levels by the rusted cogs of the universe. idk i think they're cute

my who?