Angel: you been staring at Alastor so long he’s bound to notice
Reader: I can’t help it. He’s so hot
Angel: he’s probably into some freaky shit
Alastor: my ears are burning. It’s rude to talk to about someone while not in their presence
Reader: I was just telling Angel how I’d like to get to dinner with you some time
Alastor: why that sounds like a wonderful idea
Alastor: shall we say tonight at at 8
Alastor arrives with flowers and a tux*
Reader: you look handsome
Alastor: you look very nice as well
Reader: so, what made you agree to a date?
Alastor: well I’ve always wanted to settle down
Alastor: why yes. Picture this!
Alastor: we get married, set us up a little white picket fence home in a pocket dimension. I spend my days at the radio tower, you spend your days tending to the home or engaging in your hobbies, I come home we eat dinner together then go to bed. Of course we’ll have separate beds. And we can do this everyday forever and ever
Alastor: well what did you have in mind?
Reader: ok, well I was thinking we don’t get married, we wake up and eat breakfast together, we go out every night, come home and try something new in the bedroom, then fall asleep in each arms
Alastor: something new? Like what?
Reader: like tying me up and biting me and toying with me
Alastor: that’s not very gentlemen like
Reader: sometimes it’s more attractive when you aren’t a gentleman
Waiter: here’s your bill sir
Alastor: oh dinners on them!
Reader: not like that! Alastor! Come back! ASSHOLE!!!