Professor Evil!!! @professorevilman - Tumblr Blog

i love my mom <3

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vetchtibbles

you’re either fucking with me or fucking against me

temothylol

plagiarismmmmm i’ll be seeng you in court

vetchtibbles

so it seems you’re fucking against me……

kissyourcomputertoday

mourning the loss of a movie that’s never existed

professorevilman

We might actually get it.

kissyourcomputertoday

mourning the loss of a movie that’s never existed

red-hot-chili-dogs

Usamericans are absolutely delusional.

tongzi-ziqing

Things to say when you arent an evil empire

leviathan-supersystem

"how could our empire collapse when we've overextended it so much? checkmate commies"

mechanica1-hands

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sicklesium-moved-deactivated201

i dont get offended at white people jokes even though im white because:

i can recognize white people as a whole have systemically oppressed POC in america, which is where i live

most people when they make white people jokes only mean the shitty white people and i am not a shitty white person

im not a pissbaby

damncommunists-deactivated20180

my white friends that have reblogged this give me life

zelda-tempest

4. Sometimes I am a shitty white person and the jokes remind me to FUCKIN STOP

lallamariamhabibi

If ur white and like this post I fux with u

birdpapi-deactivated20171121

^absolutely

verdant-witch

5. It’s hard to be offended when white people jokes involve bland food/tourist dads in socks and sandals/white girls in yoga pants obsessed with pumpkin spice/suburban PTA moms and other harmless and mostly true stereotypes while jokes about POC involve them being called thugs/criminals/slurs/uneducated/illegal immigrants.

blackpoeticinjustice

i fucks with u heavy if ur white and you reblog this

sm0k3-ring-deactivated20160109

6. They’re usually really fucking funny and don’t perpetuate stereotypes that will ever affect me economically, politically, or cause me any true harm, let alone create risks that “justify” my murder and/or death

epiales06

The only reason why transphobes always ask “what is a woman” instead of “what is a man” is because we all know that a man is a featherless biped.

epiales06

It’s 2023, women can have as many legs and feathers as they want- get with the times.

hux-loves-him

Behold! A woman!

saveyourhelplessspite

i enter a blog for repulsed aspecs. all the posts are about asexuality. i leave the blog for repulsed asexuals.

outsidewolves

mothermara

remember to bury the dead with a phone, everyone. these days the ferry terminal at the river styx wants you to download a fucking app

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minimosquitogirl-deactivated202

“they’re in love your honor” OVERRULED!

foone

vibrators don't go far enough. I want to be put in the pear wiggler

woodwool

worst part of being an adult is how often youre forced to nag. you Have to be annoying or youre never getting anything done. which is unfortunate considering how common it is to teach kids to never nag and be annoying ever

foone

So everyone on earth has to pick one of three doors, and then the host will reveal a goat behind one of the unpicked doors. Then you can stay with your unseen choice, or switch to another unseen door.

Behind one of the doors, everyone dies, and behind the other door, you get a car.

Which door

Door 1 - don't switch

Door 1 - switch

Red door - no switch

red door - Nintendo switch

blue door - two buttons. one always lies, the other always tells the truth

tudors

Voting ended onMay 7

half-gobbled-piece-of-toast

“I ain’t reading all that” your brain is rotting and shrinking

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army-of-bee-assassins

okay i'm reading the semantics chapter of my language development textbook now and i know i've already posted a bit about the wacky methods researchers have employed to test infants' and toddlers' linguistic knowledge, but this is a really fucking great one.

so they were trying to figure out if children use syntactic knowledge to learn new vocabulary, specifically in this case they were researching two year olds. with verbs, some are done to a person ("x hit y") and some only have a doer ("x laughed"), and they wanted to see if these different sentence structures had an effect on how toddlers learn.

they got some grad students, put one in a rabbit costume and one in a duck costume. they had the rabbit repeatedly push the duck into a crouching position using their left hand. at the same time, both the rabbit and the duck were moving their right hands in a repetitive circling motion. they had a bunch of two years olds watch this. with half of the kids, they said "the rabbit is gorping the duck!" and with the other half, they said "the rabbit and duck are gorping!" afterwards, they showed two videos at the same time to the kids, one with the rabbit pushing the duck down but no circling motion, and one with both making the circling motion but no pushing. then they said "where's gorping now? find gorping!" and the kids who had heard the first statement would consistently look towards the video of the pushing motion, while the kids who heard the second statement would consistently look towards the video of the circling motion.

so it provided good evidence that kids do learn new words using their knowledge of sentence structure! my textbook says it's called the "syntactic bootstrapping hypothesis", which is also a fun term. anyway, i just think it's a fucking hilarious way to have tested this. imagine being a linguistics grad student and your advisor is like "hey i got this furry suit. i'm gonna need you to put this on for research purposes."

foone

ever since I took a developmental psychology class in college I've wanted this job. I want to be a professional baby-confuser, for SCIENCE

great-tweets

We just knew.

awed-frog

As a reminder, this is what she looks like:

yougetsomekisses

larkiethings

Also I hope everyone knows that Miette was fostered before she was adopted, and her foster mom loved that little kitten so much and always hoped she’d gone to a good home. this tweet got so popular that she recognized Miette and reached out to her current mom, and was able to share previously unseen baby pictures