nocturnal royalty

The era of the “ten blue links” is officially over. 

At its Google I/O conference on Tuesday, Google unveiled an AI-powered overhaul of Search centered around a reimagined “intelligent search box” — what the company describes as the biggest change to this entry point to the web since the search box debuted more than 25 years ago.

Instead of returning a simple list of links, Google Search will drop users into AI-powered interactive experiences at times. Google is also introducing tools that can dispatch “information agents” to gather information on a user’s behalf, along with tools that let users build personalized mini apps tailored to their needs.

The resulting experience will no longer look much like how people envision Google Search, which has long been defined by ranked links to websites that have the information you need.

With the revamped Search experience, the new search box simply expands to accommodate longer, more conversational queries, rather than making you decide what type of search experience or mode you want to choose at the start of your query. It will also have a new AI-powered query suggestion system that goes beyond autocomplete to help people craft more complex and nuanced queries, Google says.

For something like computers, this looks like how pricey "gAmiNG" laptops look all fancy but fall apart in about the same timeframe as the lower end laptops for students. But if you've ever handled the sort of laptops for banks or businesses, you'd wonder why laptops can't all be like this. People swear by Lenovo Thinkpads for a reason. Dell's Latitude (general productivity) and Precision (has the power of a gaming laptop but far less bs) lines, HP's probooks, all feel really nice and last for-fucking-ever. But you can't buy them in a store even if you wanted one.

So the trick is to buy what big organizations are buying, but you likely gotta get 'em secondhand when the orgs are done with them. For basic clothes, mil surplus might be a good port of call, for technology see an e-waste recycler or sometimes government auction (you just gotta know what to ask for; ThinkPads, Dell Latitude/Precision, HP Probook/Zbook). Otherwise try to thrift old, pre-enshitification items. The blanket I had as a kid is still going strong and has lived to bury multiple sets of newer bedding (which have worn thin and torn). Kitchen items, see if you can shop at a restaurant supplier.

"This includes prisoners! They are not suddenly property of the state when they're convicted!" - *a little less cheering*

"And that includes children who are not their parents' property!" - *almost no cheering*

Reminder, if you ever pay someone for a commission on Paypal (NSFW OR NOT) you SHUT THE FUCK UP in any text box it gives you.

websites now:

wonderful news!! curry barker is one of my favorite (if not my favorite, hands down) short horror directors. as someone who has watched hundreds and hundreds of short horror films on youtube.

here are five of his films with the runtime and a quick summary of each. (sorry if i miss any, these are what i remember off the top of my head!) i've avoided spoilers beyond the basic premise, but every single one of these deals with Absolutely Haunting Thematic Shit:

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THE CHAIR - 25 minutes

when horror connoisseurs hear "curry barker," they usually think of the chair first. barker was approached to make this into a full-length film & pitched obsession instead... GREAT choice, as i don't think the chair would Work with extra runtime.

a man finds an old chair on the side of the road and brings it home to his girlfriend. strange events begin to unfold -- his girlfriend's behavior becomes increasingly erratic, he's losing time, he's unraveling at the seams....

if you enjoyed the fucked-up relationship dynamics in obsession then you will probably have a good time.

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MILK & SERIAL - 62 minutes

barker's other best-known horror film. a twisty found footage thriller about youtube pranksters whose pranks Go Wrong (TM).

i can't say much more than that.... if you watched obsession and thought "pretty good, but pretty predictable. i wonder how curry barker would handle a psychological thriller with more plot twists??"

boy, does this film have an answer!!

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ENIGMA - 20 minutes

this is a psychological thriller about a man dealing with the impending end of the world. explores how other people are also dealing with the end of the world.

i fear i'll give a skewed impression if i say this one is sort of a feel-good film..... but OF the films on this list, it's Certainly the most optimistic. my partner rafi (who really hates depressing horror) watched it with me and concluded, "oh, that was kind of sweet, actually!!"

this one's great if you want a palate cleanser after The Unrelenting Gutwrenching Horror of obsession.

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WARNINGS - 20 minutes

my personal favorite!! criminally underrated!! upsetting in a way that stuck to my skin for days!!

a man starts receiving strange written warnings on halloween. things around him begin to unravel.

similar to the chair in its unsettling surreality, but with a bit more supernatural influence imo. you'll recognize a lot of parallel imagery to obsession, especially with Strange Movement and Nightmare Experiences.

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HEAVY EYES - 5 minutes

the shortest one on this list if you just want to dip your toes in real quick... a pretty easy time investment if you've never watched short horror and aren't sure if you'll like it!

a boy's mom comes home unexpectedly at night.

the only problem?? she's still texting him from the hospital where she works.