Little Thoughts

For me, the sun grew dimmer every day we were apart. The bed, our bed, smelled like your skin still. And so the couch called my name at night. Pacing the halls, I could still hear your voice coming from the living room where you would stay until dawn. And for a second I could find peace in knowing that you were just working late again.. a lie that I forced myself to believe. In the morning when I awoke I assured myself that you were just working early as you had sometimes.. you’d be back soon. But the doorknob never turned. That door never opened, revealing your tired, yet beautiful, face. It continued to remain shut, just like my eyes on that final day.

Nice... I'm nice.. Am I not nice?

He says I'm a witch. He says I smother him. He cries he wants attention. He says I need help. He says he can't breathe anymore. He says he doesn't care. Won't care. Wouldn't miss me if I just died. I look in the mirror and can see the words carved into my skin.

Fat. Ugly. Liar. Lazy. Slow. Careless. Dumb. Bitch. Cunt. Whale.

Want to die just long enough

I want you to kiss my neck

Feel your hands down my spine

I want your legs to be intertwined with mine

And to feel your chest rise and fall with every breath

I want to hear you talk about anything and everything