do we think torchwood funds gender affirming care for its employees if they need it. i've got myself thinking about a reality where owen transitions instead of being a really repressed egg send help

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do we think torchwood funds gender affirming care for its employees if they need it. i've got myself thinking about a reality where owen transitions instead of being a really repressed egg send help

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"Temples and fragments of memories..." ↳ @pscentral event 51: shapes
I find it so sad when people present the history of hermitcraft as "generikb left so xisuma took over as admin and leader". like noooooo you're doing such a disservice to the chaotic group project that is hermitcraft. xisuma took on responsibility for the physical server hosting, yes, but Joe Hills broke the decision stalemate (via coup) and Hypno took the website and Cleo arrived to join the council (of people who actually go to meetings and do admin) and welsknight stood up to rap battle anyone necessary and tango came on as tech support and keralis came on as hardware sugardaddy (where's beef's new mouse?) and there's more and more and more. there's no leader of hermitcraft (Joe stood down immediately after the coup) and everyone has a veto. a lone leader would have fallen by now, it's the work of every hermit that makes the server strong
So, Jedi Survivor, right? I saw a post about someone who played it, and was commenting on how effectively the game actually showed the falling to the dark side of the Force, and stuff which I reposted, but I feel like one part they didn't mention was the wording when Cal used the dark side. It's 'embrace' the darkness. In most media, it's spoken of as falling, or turning to the dark side, because a lot of these talks are from the Jedi perspective, or from the perspective of a Sith, it's accepting it, channeling it, controlling it, because to them, they are in control. But here it's embracing. You don't just accept it, you embrace it, you give it a hug like it's an old friend you haven't seen in years, you let it into your house, sit it down at your table and cook it a warm meal. You aren't using it. The dark side is a friend. And friends don't use each other, do they?
The reason I think that embracing is quite as effective an adjective as it is, is because it encapsulates what the dark side does. It claws into you, gets a hold of you and posits itself as your best friend. Something that you can't live without. The dark side, at least the first few times you use it, is like smoking a packet of cigarettes, except they're laced with 20mg of the purest cocaine on earth. You know it's bad for you, but damn does it take all your problems away. And so you keep using it. It's a crutch, a coping mechanism, where you can vent, and release your anger. The dark doesn't judge. It doesn't make fun of you. It accepts that anger, grows on it, and it gives you solutions. Ways to take the pain away. Kill, and you'll be happy. Kill, make others suffer and no one will ever be able to make you suffer in turn. We see that with Anakin, where Sidious convinces Anakin to join him by offering him a way to avoid his suffering. And Cal does the same. These people, Denvik, Bode and all of Nova Garon and the Empire have hurt him. Hurt his family, hurt his crew and taken the lives of his first master, his second master and her own master in turn, Greez's arm and Trilla and the Anchorites and the dark gives him an easy way to take that pain away. Make the Empire suffer. Embrace the dark. Because the darkness is easy. It's quick power, brutal and ruthless and simple. Take those emotions you've suppressed, that hatred for the Empire and use it to fuel that fight. It's as they say, "the road to Hell is paved with good intentions." People fall to the dark side for selfish reasons: vengeance, power and conquest, but they also do it to save the ones they love, to keep them safe, to keep themselves safe, so that the people they love can't be hurt again. Bode does the same thing, embracing the darkness after Dagan shows him visions of Kata being killed, and he's so consumed with a desperate fear to stop that from happening, and I think that if they explore this idea in Jedi: 3, then I would be really happy because damn do I want to see the effects of the dark side on Cal as a character, and how he navigates through the story, either slowly returning to the light or falling deeper into this pit that he and the Empire have dug him into.
Final point, I think, and it's just me continuing the whole "road to Hell, good intentions" thing. The Sith and Inquisitors do this as well, and it's corrupting perception and the truth, or at least showing them in the worst way possible. Trilla does it in Fallen Order, the whole "Cere was my master" reveal basically being "she just handed over our location to the Empire" which, she did, but it leaves out the whole "Inquisitorial torture" bit. And then the whole "From my point of view the Jedi are evil" shtick that Anakin does which, while stupid, because they aren't, shows how his perception of reality has been completely fucked, because like, you're saying that the organisation that actively tries to save as many lives as possible is evil, while you, Mr. Baby Killer 9000, are not?? Huh??? And then Bode's perception is that Cal is an active threat to him, as if by trying to save the lives of refugees of the Hidden Path he's actively endangering his family, and to an extent he's right, more compasses being made increases the chance of the Empire getting their grubby little hands on one, but like, father and daughter on a planet? Alone? For the rest of their lives? How lonely an existence that is. And for Kata, that's moving her from one gilded cage in Nova Garon to a larger one in Tanalorr. And she's perfectly capable of understanding that this isn't something she wants, and she's also capable of understanding the problems with what her dad wants, better than he does as well.
So, I don't have a closing statement. There is no thesis or final point that I want to make other than, don't embrace the dark side kids, it isn't good for you.

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"you were only a child when they sent you off to war"
and cere hits the mark with this. cal was a child soldier who lost his entire culture at 12, and this trauma affects everything he does in survivor.
god, I love this game
my favoritest thing in hermitcraft fanfiction is when it takes place in a pseudo-minecraft fantasy realm but the hermits are still sometimes described with their nationalities. like okay this is a world where magic exists and you can respawn after you die and the entirety of reality sometimes gets new features added and new worlds can be created out of thin air, each with their own accompanying otherworldly pocket dimensions, and some people have special admin powers that allow them to alter the fabric of reality, and gods/cosmic horror monsters/a weird cult called the Watchers may or may not inhabit the spaces in between existence. also Canada exists. Canada exists here and we are not going to address it
WHO
excerpt from Star Wars: Revenge of the Sith Novelization by Matthew Stover
just my take on the matter. click post.

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saw this meme and i noticed smth REALLY interesting
in both pics of anakin, his face is half in the dark, half in the light, showing the conflict within him. this is widely known, especially for the ep. III pic.
but here’s something even more interesting… which probably wasn’t even intentional, but it’s cool nonetheless.
on the left from the scene in clone wars, the right side of anakin’s face is in the light— the side of his face where ahsoka slashes open his mask in rebels.
similarly, the left side of his face is in the light in ep. III when talking to obi-wan, the same side that obi-wan cuts in the obi-wan show.
like. even when anakin was completely consumed by the dark side, ahsoka and obi-wan were able to cut open his mask and reveal a little bit of that light and the person they once knew.
😭😭😭😭 i’m not crying you are
mask cut pics for reference (left is rebels, right is obi-wan show)
Jack consistently refers to Ianto as someone he can trust and someone he relies on, and while I think a good part of that is because Jack is certain that Ianto loves him, I think it's a bit deeper than that.
Everyone on the team loves Jack, but it's more of an idlization, not a peer to peer connection. It's ironic since Ianto spent so much time literally being jack's house servent but I think that's part of the reason he has such a different dynamic with Jack. Jack didn't realise how close he was letting Ianto get until it was too late.
The rest of the team sees him as this larger than life figure who can do no wrong, who always knows what to do, and will do it with so much confidence you won't even question it. But even before they're together, Ianto sees more than that. He's allowed to see more because he's the butler. He's the one who takes jack's coat, so he's allowed to see him without it so to speak.
The same way your doctor is permitted to see you injured when you might hide it from your friends.
But I think the deeper reason that Jack trusts him so much is because he knows that Ianto does what's right for Jack, not for himself.
When owen opened the rift Ianto tried to stop him, not because he didn't want Jack back. Ianto missed Jack desperately. He tried to stop him because he knew jack wouldn't want people put in danger. The rest of the team love how being around Jack makes them feel. Ianto loves Jack. Ianto is willing to loose Jack forever if it means doing right by him. He cares more about Jack as an individual than how Jack influences his life.
We see this again in the novel "in the shadows". Jack is sent to what is effectively hell, most people die of old age there but Jack never will. Everyone is grieving and ianto in particular is nearly catatonic with grief. However, is first words, his first priority is how Jack won't die. He'll suffer for eternity. And in the end, Ianto even sacrifices himself to save Jack. Everyone else is approaching the situation like Jack is dead, because whether he's dead and cannot feel pain, or alive and in constant pain doesn't matter to them, because they don't get to be around him either way. Ianto is the only one who cares about how Jack is being affected by this, everyone else is only thinking about themselves. Gwen even out right says that jack being immortal is a good thing, because it gives them more of a chance to save him. In her mind jack suffering for thousands of years is better than him dying after 60, because it gives her a better chance at seeing him again.
(I could write an essay on "in the shadows" but I think another part of why Jack trusts him so much is because Ianto is just as versed in hiding pain. So much so that he can recognize Jack hiding it. Jack's personal hell includes Ianto not forgiving him, to the point that he forces Jack to kill him because he'd rather die by jacks hand than be loved by him. Jack is saved from this hell by Ianto who explicitly says he's there to forgive Jack. Jack even sees him as an angelic figure, he sees this as repentance, and forgiveness. Ianto has hurt enough and hidden it enough that he knows not to believe it when Jack says he's fine. He knows exactly what to say and how to say it.)
This also feeds into my next point: there are several moments where Ianto worries over Jack after he dies or is injured. He at one point asks if Jack died while they were separated and when Jack says yes he hugs him. He also asked if belong blown up hurt and comforts him after Jack confirms that yes it did. He also holds jacks body until he comes back to life. The rest of the team just assumes that he's fine once he's come back. Ianto is the only one who sees past the joy of having Jack back, and acknowledges how awful it must feel to die and then just come back and be thrown right back into it. Ianto provides a few moments of comfort and stands as a place Jack can slow down and process before having to go back to the pain and death.
Even at the very end, Ianto dies because he wouldn't let Jack go alone. Even though he knew it was dangerous. Even though Jack would be find alone and literally cannot die. Ianto has the exact opposite of an "ends justify the means" belief system. Just because Jack will technically be fine at the end, that doesn't mean Ianto can just sit back and watch him go through hell. Ianto came with him because he knew Jack was going to have a difficult time facing the 456 and couldn't let Jack do it alone.
And then, even after his death in "the house of the dead" when he comes back for a short time, he still saves Jack. Even though he selfishly wants to spend as much time with jacks as possible, he still won't put other people in danger for it. Even though in that moment Jack wants nothing more than to have Ianto back, Jack as a person is still so focused on protecting earth and doing whats best for humanity. Even at the very end Ianto can look past what he wants, and what Jack in this moment is weak enough to admit he wants, and do what's right. He does right by Jack. His last ever decision is to selflessly sacrifice himself, and do right by Jack.
gay people can never say I love you it's always some shit like "the world could be ending" "the world's always ending"
partially-managed mental illness is so fucking funny i'll be sitting around doing my job and suddenly think "wow i hate myself" and immediately get confused because, like, that's not TRUE! i love myself so much. who are you to talk to me like that
best kinds of characters either:
is/has been an active suicide risk
doesn’t or cannot consider suicide a real option and so is left with an inarticulable feeling of circling the drain

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I’m an introvert in every way until I like you then I’m the biggest annoying yapper who sucks up all the air in the room and can talk for hours. unless I’m scared you hate me in which case I’ll stumble through like 2 sentences and then go quiet and hope you don’t get mad