Pink Liv

i am really really sick of the main non binary representation i see being like. blorbey from your indie projects and zork the alien from your kids' cartoons

and whenever someone talks about non binary representation, everyone rushes to tell them about blorbey and zork like. i am glad they exist. i have nothing against them at all but. i also just don't care

like i'm sorry i'm sorryyyyy but: who are PRIMARILY the audiences of Queer Indie Project #928467 and US childrens' animation? young people, queer people, and the chronically online. you know, the people who most likely already know that there are genders other than male and female without needing to see it in media first????

and that doesn't make it less important, i know, but like. idk i just wish we were normal

i want non binary people in cheesy christmas films and cheap thriller novels. i want to see us in museum treasure hunts and café-menu characters. i want us in toothpaste adverts and maths questions and safety training videos. i want us as newsreaders and sport commentators and nature documentary voiceovers. i want us on packaging and in pantos and on quiz show telly i can talk about with my grandparents i just want to be normal!!!!!

and ik this stuff is boring and not glamorous or sexy, and other people might think it doesn't even matter, but. as a gender neutral person i don't think i'll ever feel like societal views are changing in our favour until we're represented in the mundane, mainstream, everyday, media

so forgive me. for not getting excited about the next blorbey or zork or other such token non binary character who is either a skinny white american or literally not human. and for feeling like i'm expected to just sit and be grateful for that

problem solving steps

I have a question since it came up recently in a discussion:

I answered hate it, but I do believe there is a bit of nuance. Although I think executive dysfunction is the best and most specific term, I see a lot of people, who aren't diagnosed with ADHD/another relevant form of neurodivergence or do not know what executive function is or entails, using the term, where ignorance seems to be more prevalent than outright hostility (although I have seen people be overly defensive of using the term paralysis for adhd).

Thus, I certainly don't like it when people are like "who is experiencing paralysis" to mean who is struggling with executive functioning, but even as someone who cares deeply about language and its power, it has to be one of the less irksome things I here (not that the bar should be so low, but ignorance that can often be easily resolved isn't my biggest issue as far as ableism goes).

I would say, though, that the biggest reason it bothers me is because paralysis is so much more than the ability to not move. It is without exception (to my knowledge) always a complex neurological condition. Spinal cord injuries (in my case) are something that everyone (the general populous) seems to assume they know more about than they actually do. There are often many aspects of how disabling an SCI is, especially a higher level SCI (complete or incomplete) that people they miss because of that.

I think even the word task paralysis is slightly less outright in its punching-down ableism than paralysis, essentially devoid of modifiers (no, ADHD is not a descriptive modifier). Although hearing these terms used may annoy me, they don't overly offend me unless the person is knowledgeable of why it's ableist and does it anyway.

the fact that SOME trans women and fems are enbyphobic and transmisandrist doesn't give ANYONE the right to misgender them, deadname them, or be otherwise transphobic/transmisogynistic.

i saw someone call a trans woman a "shemab" for holding those opinions, and that's not something we do here, folks!!! i won't tolerate that!!!

We went from 30,000 to 50,000 so fast that I didn't have a chance to make the 40,000 pic!

Go go go!

[ survey.gendercensus.com ]

The 13th annual international gender census, collecting information about the language we use to refer to ourselves and each other, is now open until 13th August 2026.

It’s short and easy, for most participants it takes 5-6 minutes.

After the survey is closed I’ll process the results and publish a spreadsheet of the data and a report summarising the main findings. Then anyone can use them for academic or business purposes, self-advocacy, tracking the popularity of language over time, and just feeling like we’re part of a huge and diverse community.

If you think you might have friends and followers who’d be interested, please reblog this blog post, and share the survey URL by email or at AFK social groups or on other social networks. Every share is extremely helpful!

Survey URL: https://survey.gendercensus.com

The survey is open to anyone anywhere who speaks English and feels that the gender binary doesn’t fully describe their experience of themselves and their gender(s) or lack thereof.

Thank you so much!

[ Link to survey ]

PS: You can see some regularly-updated statistics about incoming data here, with lots of demography and graphs to peruse!