Sweeter

wdym where's my halo? you don't need a halo to be an angel, and i clearly am look at my beautiful holy wings.. wdym they're covered in soot and brimstone? you can't say mean things like that to an angel like me! they're literally radiant and pretty??? wdym "what about your cartoonish succubus tail?" that's literally my fucking angel... thing.. it's got a heart on the end ur not working with me here wdym wdym

*flutters my wings indignantly in a way that makes my boobs bounce* ur all just jealous of my angel thing

scientists are trying to discover something harder than getting out of bed to go to work in the morning. and dont make a fucking penis joke ok they already checked everyone’s dick and it doesn’t even come close

apparently youre supposed to perform. they love it when you perform. but it has to be authentic. they hate it when it's not authentic. but you have to perform.

Im always like "i will not add my two cents. i will not add my two cents" but i cant lie the pennies are getting sweaty in my hand

i need to imagine some scenarios

a chainsaw is a lot like a hot glue gun

when you have one in your hands you start to get Ideas about your surroundings

kitten, the cost of living is simply too high. we're gonna need to each get at least one other weed smoking girlfriend to keep momma's farm

fuuuck I could use a mysterious benefactor right now

the princess needs to lay on the floor for two hours. the princess needs to writhe

May I serve her Ladyship a floor meal? (very cheesy noodles and perchance some snacks like chips or so. Accompanied by a fizzy beverage and a cigarette if wanted)

this pleases the princess. please bring her the royal Newport 100. the princess must chill maximum style

As her Ladyship pleases. *goes off to buy cigarettes and will never be seen again*

devoured by the gas station dragon i fear