Uhhhh

"like a boss" by lonely island was released ten thousand years ago when mammoths still roamed the big wide world. feel old yet?

ever since i was a little girl i knew i wanted to be someones lame ass boyfriend

if i dont respond to a message from you i can basically guarantee its not because i dislike you. im just getting attacked by imps and shit all the time genuinely.

When all you have is a handsaw, every problem looks like a beautiful lady in a box. And you have a magician outfit. And people are watching.

youre just jealous because you didnt get trapped in a dark and twisted maze by the evil wizard. and yes shes likes women

You can tell a lot about a person by entering their mind palace and encountering their greatest fears and darkest hopes in a labyrinth reflective of their subconscious thoughts.

Hi, its me. The warmest creature in the world. I love you. Im the warmest creature in the world and I love you so much and I need to be in your lap right now. Yes, I know about the heat wave. That's okay though because I was already the warmest creature in the world so I don't mind. I love you and you need to let me sleep in your lap right now. I'm soooo warm and I love you sooo much. If you say no you'll be saying no to a thing that love you. Let me sleep in your lap. When I fall asleep I get warmer. I love you

I have already died thrice by 1pm

has anyone got that post with the comic atrip alien that says "what channel is the women's wrestling on"