Jay the Juiceman

These wonderful people have a single braincell to share but unfortunately none of them are using it

being an adult is just saying to yourself “this is the weekend i’ll clean my [x]” and then proceeding to not do that because it’s the weekend and you deserve to relax, goddamnit

why does this have 85K notes

because we reblogged it instead of cleaning our [x]

#my[x]

basketball dracula isn't real dude he can't-- *sudden squeaking noises from the shadows*

*two pool toys having sex tumble by in the wind* oh thank god

*thunderous slam dunk noise*

I love helping everyone rediscover the fact that the opening passage of My Immortal is a parody of the opening passage of The Vampire Lestat and not just a generic exaggeration of the typical fanfic Mary Sue introduction. One of the many delightful goth kid Easter eggs the author planted for the audience.

I'm convinced My Immortal is a big joke, not a legitimate amateur teenage fanfic

my 100% proof of this is how she always spells sirius black's name as "serious". at one point, sirius says something in a grave manner, written in the story as: "serious said siriusly". its my favorite bit

My fat fairy ass eating the sprinkles off of donuts and sipping on sprite puddles

fairies r fat as shit off nectar

You can just say Haruki Murakami's books