Passeriform

Apparently my favorite picture books as a child were written by queer authors.  This brings me joy.

Look, most of the queer people I know, myself included, had pretty rough childhoods (for a variety of reasons, but being recognizably queer was part of it) and as a result, we are fiercely protective of kids. Not protecting kids in a walled-garden sense the way conservatives want, but celebrating the wonder and whimsy and weirdness of being a child, and treating children as people - people who might need more supervision and care, but people with opinions and thoughts that really do matter. So of course the most beloved children's books of the last 40 years are written by queer folx. It makes perfect sense.

forget everything anyone has ever told you on the matter the truest marker of adulthood is starting to hear the siren call of high quality kitchenware

to be clear you SHOULD buy that cast iron pan and you SHOULD buy that knife set and you SHOULD buy that fancy rice cooker and you SHOULD buy that novelty mug. high quality kitchenware is always worth it you’re literally gonna be using that almost every day

at some point in your life you will be boiling fruit, water, sugar, and lemon juice in a pot to make a syrup or jam. the instructions will tell you to simmer for a certain amt of time. your timer will go off and you will look at the pot and go, "hm, this doesn't look thick enough. maybe i'll let it go for another 10 minutes." this is the devil speaking. it's only so liquid right now because it is at boiling point. it will thicken when it cools down. learn from the follies of my youth and do not let this happen to you

at some point in your life you will be making a sauce or a stew in which you need to add cornstarch to thicken it. and you will prepare a slurry of starch in cold water and think "this looks like way too little starch to thicken this amount of liquid." this is the devil speaking. cornstarch instantly polymerizes at 95°C and if you add too much it will turn into an impossibly thick goop.

at some point in your life you will be making some sort of cream based dessert that requires gelatin to thicken it. and you will soak some gelatin sheets in water and think "this is too few gelatin sheets for this amount of cream." this is the devil speaking. it will thicken in the fridge and if you add too much you will end up with milk jelly

at some point in your life you will be baking cookies. you will take the sheet out after twelve minutes as the recipe instructs and the cookies will still be glistening and soft. "these don't seem cooked enough," you will think to yourself, "i should place them back into the oven until their edges are nice and golden." this is the devil talking. this is how you get dry, overdone cookies. the cookies will continue to bake on the warm sheet for several more minutes and then harden up after sitting on a rack for a while. trust the process. trust the process.

at some point in your life you will be adding a small pasta to a soup and you will think "that is not enough small pasta." this is the devil talking. the pasta will absorb the stock and expand. this is how you end up with a soup that is a solid mass of soggy ditalini.

At some point in your life you will be adding garlic to a dish and you will think "that is not enough garlic." These are angels speaking. They are correct. Add more garlic.

@hellenhighwater @copperbadge

These popcorns are very spicy.

sucking at something is the first step to getting good at it

skip divorce where for various reasons scott hunter ends up crashing on shane and ilya’s couch after the public intoxication charges… on the couch because ilya won’t let him sleep in the guest room (he wants to turn him out of the house) and this was their compromise. he and shane keep having whispered fights about it in the kitchen while scott is morosely watching tv in the living room with the volume on full blast while secretly nipping whiskey out of a flask he’s been cunningly concealing between the couch cushions. shane is like he’s a fucking mess ilya, it’s actually embarrassing and pretty bad PR like he’s kind of making all gay hockey players look bad, isn’t it better to let him stay for a few days out of the public eye, and ilya is like that prehistoric barely alive intoxicated dinosaur is going to try to FUCK my beautiful HUSBAND I’ve already SEEN him making sad wet eyes at you hoping you’ll find him pathetic enough to hook up with, and shane is like oh my god ilya don’t be ridiculous he just got divorced he doesn’t want to have sex with me!!!!, and scott hunter who just lurched into the kitchen unheard behind them and is a flask and a half deep at this point is like soooo [hiccup] what’s up with you guys anyway. like is your marriage basically open or— and then ilya tries to kill him.

this sculpture is from 2011 by artist sara swink

cats have been bothering humans since at least 2011