Impressed By Awesomeness

imagine being on your lunch break, and your supervisor comes over to your table, tells you to stand up in front of everyone. they draw everyone's attention to your thighs. they tell you that you have broken the dress code because of the length of your shorts. they tell you to go change (so you do not get the rest of your lunch break). they do this every single day at lunch. every day. so you read the whole dress code front and back, and you choose your clothing carefully to not break it. you bring a cloth tape measure with you to work because they will not believe you. this time when your supervisor tells you that you're breaking dress code, you pull out your tape measure and show that you are within the limit. your supervisor says "I bet you wouldn't want me to bring you to the boss and let him measure it, would you?" it's clearly a threat: if you don't obey then you will be put alone in a room with your boss and he will touch your thighs. you don't know how to respond. you're taken out of lunch again.

In 2013, the Daily Show with Jon Stewart hired two men to pretend to date in Mississippi and Alabama to see how people reacted (with hidden cameras). It was part of a longer segment that pointed out how extremely homophobic the laws were in those states. I remember watching the episode nervous for the two men - who were muscular stunt workers instead of regular actors (to dissuade someone from trying to hit them, I was pretty sure). Reminder that this is 2013. In Alabama sodomy is a felony. Federal Gay Marriage is two years away. Civil Unions are banned in many states and the government is hostile as fuck.

So let me tell you what happened. The segment host sends the two men out (one in plaid and the other in camo I think) to hold hands because this is expected to draw a reaction. I was certain they’d be harassed. Certain. But then someone comes up to them on the street it’s to tell them their love is beautiful and they’re the most “punk gay” couple they’ve ever seen. Other people simply walk by without acting like seeing two men together is controversial at all. The segment host sends the “couple” to a fairgrounds to get their picture taken, to hold hands, to kiss. As I’m watching, I am concerned this will end poorly. But the old man taking their picture compliments them. No one harasses them. I’m shocked. Lastly, the host sends them to a Waffle House, one in each state, and has one of the men propose to the other. This is going to be it, I think, no one there will let this stand. And the people at the restaurant when the other guy says yes? They fucking clap. The entire segment to joke about which state is more homophobic sort of… backfires.

Guys, I’ve been thinking about this segment a lot recently. Because the news is shitty, and politicians’ behavior is shitty, and we’re ramping up to dealing with another shitty year of campaigns BUT SOMEHOW in 2013, when I was completely convinced that two guys were going to get beat up in broad daylight for holding hands, people were kind to them. So I just wanted to throw this out there. Yes, the laws are important. Very fucking important. And yes, progress feels slow as fuck. But also, people clapped. And my younger self stared at that tv screen in complete bafflement and awe.

My country is represented by people who do not represent their constituents.

I hate the squirrls

I hate the trees

I hate ra bbits

I hate all bees

I have no per

son al ity

be yond my lawn

Sam: You set me on fire.

Author: @vmohlere

Summary: The mission resets abruptly, from objective: kill to objective: protect

Submitted by: @kiragecko