Impressed By Awesomeness

Can someone give me pre serum stucky fic recs… I need to feel upset

notice how everyones 30 now

does anyone know i’m thinking about stucky i say AS A JOKE as the fucking avengers assemble theme starts playing during the fireworks show im watching

I really can and will blame the 9-5 for everything. "We're in a loneliness epidemic" well, we have to spend a third of our day interacting with people in a professional way that makes forming real friendships difficult and then we're peopled out by the time we're done. "People are eating more and more unhealthily" people have to spend more than a third of their day doing work related tasks and they don't want to spend their tiny amount of free time making food. "People aren't involved in their local communities" after spending more than a third of their day doing work related things people are tired and also all those community events take place during normal working hours. "People need to get more hobbies" after spending more than a third of their day working, people are TIRED and don't want to do anything that takes yet more energy. "Literacy is dying" to maintain your critical thinking skills you need to read/watch things that make you think and after spending more than a third of your day doing work related stuff you are TIRED and don't want to expend even more brainnpower. "People need to get outside more" People. Are. TIRED. Because they have to spend all of their time working or preparing for work or recovering from work or doing all the chores they couldn't stay on top of because of work. I can blame fucking anything on having to work, it is truly the root of all fucking evil.

men will say “princess treatment ❤️” and then it’s just how i normally treat the cashier at the store

I love it when people respond to witnessing some tomfuckery before noon with "it's [time] in the fucking morning" like it's too early to be witnessing some ridiculous nonsense. As if the bullshit has a schedule, can't start hijinks before five o' clock. Them people doing bicycle jousting with umbrellas at 7 am have been at it for 5 hours now.

moms when you are already extremely overwhelmed and in a terrible headspace: I think I’m going to rearrange all of the furniture and vacuum the ceiling in every room

It’s sick and twisted how Steve Rogers and Bucky Barnes don’t call each other “doll” and “dollface” more in fanfiction. Sick and fucking twisted

Must not pick that scab off. It will not in fact get rid of the scab and just create a different scab. The scab is not done cooking yet. I am completely normal about scabs. <-gripping the edges of his chair so tightly the wood is starting to crack

sometimes i get weirdly anxious about the fact that thousands of years of evolution have led to my specific bloodline and it will almost certainly be ending with me. but then i remember the same is true of like every fly that dies in a drink before it gets the chance to reproduce so like. who am i to get all precious about the concept of bloodlines really. who give a shit. my ancestors arent any better than that flys ancestors.

How can I get a full time job as the wandering stranger that comes into town and gets by on odd jobs and has their face partially obscured by a hood and/or cowboy hat

random niche hill ill die on is that i think all languages should be called whatever they call themselves in that language. if it's español en español it should be español in english. what the hell is a spanish anyways.

im a simple man i like when things are shaped like other things. stool shaped like a mushroom. pillows shaped like fruit. salt and pepper shaker shaped like two friends hugging. in my ideal world i will have a house stocked entirely with novelty objects shaped like other objects and it will be beautiful.