#1 porygon z fan

time to make a post on tumblr. surely no one will interpret it to be as offensive and bad intentioned as possible.

every day i get a little madder about the ‘dream job’ narrative… all i want is to have a job that benefits society somewhat, doesn’t abuse me, and lets me live a happy life outside of my job lol. jobs should not be (and arguably can’t be) cosmic destinies and identities

literally the worst way of ending a series is “all the survivors are happily straight married with tons and tons of babies!” 

people still getting mad at this post i made in 2014 so I will add here. in 2026. that the point of this post isn’t “happy endings bad” its when the story’s only way to imagine a happy ending is a heterosexual nuclear family for everyone.

Why is pet play always dogs anyway

Youre a dirty little goldfish arent you. daddys gonna clean your tank out so good so you have to wait in the sink until im done.

Apparently because you have no idea how to care for anything but a dog

Daddy is not known for his animal husbandry

"I'm so normal about this" good for you. I'm so perverted and predatory about it

Your 20s are not about getting your life together they're about learning to escape the self imposed torture labyrinth you've built inside your own head

i think i’m going to be straight now can a girl come on this post so i can practice i want to try to be straight today

i need a girl to come on to this post i need to try something

ok. im come over.

heyyyy lol 😛 sooooooo *leans against the wall in a way that’s way way way way too close and you can smell my deer attractant and axe body spray combo* ummmm *blushes* *goes red*

ok. whatever. *looks away from you, hornily*

*i panic and rip your face off*

ummm.... ok... kind of weird... you are such a weird guy lol.... kind of funny tho... lol... can we kiss now. *i am unperturbed and my face is growing back slowly because i am immortal*

OOC: Godmodding. This is why i never RP with women

OOC: Typical misogyny. And of course the mod team does nothing. This is why rpworld.zetaforums.net is failing. I’ll be taking me - and my FOURTY-SEVEN active RP threads - to roleplaydream.invisionfree.com. Thanks for nothing.

OOC: Have fun getting anyone to play with your shitty mary sue. Go back to fanfic

What the fuck did I just read?  As a role player and a non-straight woman... I think I need a drink after reading this.  You are BOTH terrible role players, and neither of you are worthy of a good plot. 

*crawls towards you on all fours submissively hoping you don’t hurt me*

no dude it's so cool how attached you are to that character who is singled out and ostracized due to the external monstrousness that clashes with their internal spark of humanity. and i love how drawn you are to themes of horror and love, nature versus nurture, otherness, isolation, and the abject. i bet you have normal feelings about your own personhood

the thing about job searching is i see all these job postings and im like i dont wanna do any of this for any of you

What would you do if you were scrolling through recommended tumblr posts and one was from someone you don't know and it was just a picture of your dad captioned "fucking hate this guy" and it had hundreds of notes

reblog it

the cambrian period was like 10 years ago

the cambrarin period was like 3 years ago

I would take a job pushing the Sisyphus rock if it paid 20 an hour and I could wear my headphones

People are unfazed if you hate women but if you dislike dogs they assume you're a bad person

Tumblr users will read a post complaining about normalized misogyny and hyperfocus on your claim that it's ok to dislike dogs

girl who finally is going back to reading by finishing one book: now i'm going to read all the books in the world.