Paradoxicalli

*introducing myself to the guards who caught me* seized to meet you

It's nice that loud noises don't stick to clothes like smells do. That would be really bad if they did.

who hurt you

today my dnd party found that yeehaw steves best friend who died (which then caused him to attempt to kill himself, and led to his spiral into depression) is actually ALIVE and doesn't know of yeehaw steves death, making them sad :)

romeo and juliet them I fucking dare you

having a body made of meat sucks ass

kill dorothy fuck the lion marry the tin man and i dont care about the other one

Bruh this is the shit I’m finding at 3:00 a.m

MY NAME, IS FRICKIN MOON MOON. I’D BE THE MOST IDIOTIC WOLF. ‘OH SHIT WHO BROUGHT FUCKING MOON MOON ALONG?’

the post that started it all

oh god

Never not reblogging.

I’ve only seen this post in screenshots

I’m very surprised this post hasn’t broken a million.

Today’s mood is: this is literally making me cry.

inherent gay need to redesign my bedroom every 3 months

Barricade the door

No I’m not attracted to you. Quit your evil putting your finger under my chin to make me look up at you. I know I’m your nemesis and all but we really need to set some boundaries when you’ve got me tied up like this.

No look I get it. You’ve got your evil plan, you’ve gotta get me out of the way but you also want to see me suffer as I watch the world burn, I know. But like, I’m not into this. Sexually or otherwise. Wait, you thought I was doing this because I liked you? I’m trying to stop you from using a death laser. No I don’t think death lasers are sexy what on earth are you talking about

Wait. That’s why you dress like that? I thought that armor was impractical. No I don’t find our relationship to be homoerotic I find it to be tedious. Look, man. We all keep trying to get you into therapy. No I’m not kink shaming you I’m saying you’ve completely misinterpreted this relationship. I actually do think you should answer for your war crimes. Yes, really. No you’re the one not listening to me in this situation. Yes that is the alarm the others will have cut all your wires and called in the fbi by now.

What do you mean you thought we had something special? I have other enemies. You’re not the only one. No I’m not doing kinky things with them either I blow up their nefarious devices. Speaking of which, you might want to move like… ten feet to your right.

The henchmen in the tags who have been assuring the villain since the beginning that “of course he likes you back, why else would he keep coming to destroy your death lasers”

The henchmen have been reading too many romance novels.

Awfully defensive are we? I think the henchmen are onto something.

You know I didn’t intend for this character I made up to be aromantic but this whole post has turned into being arospec at a family reunion simulator

Enemies to Queerplatonic

No.

enemies to arch enemies?

rb for trans pride 🏳️‍⚧️

One massive, legitimate way to improve as a writer or artist or in any creative endeavor really, is to become absolutely obsessed with something and to allow yourself to be weird about it. Genuinely mean this btw.