I hope you like OCs

basketball dracula isn't real dude he can't-- *sudden squeaking noises from the shadows*

*two pool toys having sex tumble by in the wind* oh thank god

*thunderous slam dunk noise*

Hello bisexual community

Begin killing

Dat's right boss. Now just tell us what ya need and we'll get it done boss.

who needs ta sleep with da fishes boss

sorry bawss, I was too busy searchin up da anime girls boss. real pretty.

Forget dem anime goils. Dere only temporary. But da boss is forever. Right boss?

Da boss got turned into a butterfly!!

Wadda bea-utiful transformation, boss. goes to show youse gotta preciate the lil things in life

ay boss congrats on da metamoiphosis

if cis people are so great then why don’t they have a siberian orchestra 

the self care industry will sell you face masks and teas and whatnot so i'm here to remind you not to forget the most important self care activity which is masturbation

LOL but seriously release the hounds

agnostic is lowkey the funniest belief system it's just like yeah idk it's none of my business

Hey everyone, remember that being sick or healing from injuries is a hard time for your body. You have to eat a lot and lay still and be kind to yourself! [large neon sign that says HYPOCRITE descends from the ceiling and points at me] Hey what the heck what's this who put that there

uooooogh the christian God is actually deer skull and raccoon salmon in pickup truck ooooooooooooooo and She (god) (usually refererd to as Male but im Queering it) talked to me in parking lot and said uh h Life Is Decay Anr Rotting and Sunlight is actually the souls of deer skull and i was like woah but im just little old me from somewhere in the contiguous USA and She (god) (Queering it) said being Yourself is th e most important thing and that i should Vote