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The Barbados threadsnake (Tetracheilostoma carlae) is a species of threadsnake and currently holds the record for the smallest snake species in the world. On average, adult snakes measure just under four inches in length.

T. carlae is thought to feed primarily on a diet of termites and ant larvae. Threadsnakes are oviparous, laying eggs to reproduce. The female of this snake species produces only one large egg at a time. The emerging offspring is about half the length of the mother, which is considerably larger than the offspring of other snakes (usually 10% the size of an adult).

me: great!

scam caller: good. I’m calling because your IP address has been compromised. I’ll just need you to get in front of your computer so we can get your account fixed up.

me: okay! there is one thing I’m wondering, though

scam caller: what?

me: you really couldn’t think of a better lie?

scam caller:

me: like, my “IP address has been compromised.” How, exactly, does an IP address become “compromised”?

scam caller:

me: I was just wondering, is all

scam caller: why did you answer?

me:

me: what?

scam caller: if you knew this wasn’t a legitimate call, then why did you answer?

me: oh, I just though I would have some fun at your expense.

scam caller: what expense? talking is no expense to me.

me: well, you’re currently not accomplishing your goal

scam caller: my goal?

me: your goal of scamming my elderly grandmother. You’re not accomplishing that. I’d call that an expense.

scam caller: well, can I scam you?

me:

me: did you- did you ask if you can scam me?

scam caller: yes. can I scam you?

me, baffled: sure, you can try

scam caller: you need to get in front of your computer

me: yeah, that’s still a problem. I’m eating tater tots right now and I really don’t feel like getting up.

scam caller: okay. I will call you tomorrow morning, then.

me: I might not answer. My grandma definitely won’t.

scam caller: You answered today.

me: …touché?

Basically, it seems there’s some bit stuck on zero. Just compare the binary values of the letters:

In “Windows” => “Wandows”:

i = 01101001 a = 01100001

And in “Normally” => “Ngrmadly”:

o = 01101111 g = 01100111

l = 01101100 d = 01100100

You see, in the misplaced letters, the fifth bit is “zero” when you would expect it to be “one”. That’s the difference.

Also, it seems to happen on every fourth letter, but in some letters, we don’t see it because their fifth bit already is zero: “Wandows” has both the “i” (changed to an “a”) and the small “w” affected, but “w” is 01110111, so the bug doesn’t make a difference.

suddenly the contractions start