To better articulate some earlier posts, I think if your impression of an entire category of trans people (transfems, transmascs, nonbinary people, etc) is that they're all raging bigots who hate anyone who's trans in a different direction or even that they all have extremist political beliefs that cause them to hate anyone with different anatomy...
It probably means you are only engaging with that group of people in antagonistic ways through discourse and the worst of the worst spaces where it happens. You're not engaging with people in that demographic in ways that aren't hostile and aggressive. That's a problem.
Sure, there are trans women who behave like alt-right chuds because they've spent the past ten years on 4chan, and they probably have all kinds of deeply misogynistic beliefs about transmascs and nonbinary people. Some might also be in hypersexualized communities with harmful behavior (which they're probably more likely to be primary victims of than you). But most trans women and transfems are not even remotely like that, and even the hangers-on who get some of their discoursey ideas from those ones are probably not aware where those ideas originated and will, under the right circumstances, reflect and recognize why those ideas are flawed. They just need to have paths out of those communities and other places to go for community that they know are safe.
Sure, there are trans men who have gross, transmisogynistic ideas about trans women and think the only way to affirm the masculinity they're so insecure about is to put transfems down. Some find comfort in TERF ideas because TERFs intentionally groom them into those beliefs and have them convinced that they're the only ones who care about the oppression they face based on their anatomy and percieved femininity (again, they're the most likely victims in those cases). But, again, most transmascs aren't like that and generally, most do respect and care about transfems and trans women and take transmisogyny seriously. Most want to be in community with transfems if they can find communities that are safe and won't actively exclude them.
Some binary people are massive bigots to nonbinary people, but in my 13 years of being out as nonbinary, I've found that the vast majority are not and have no desire to be. Some nonbinary people are assholes to other trans people, but most take solidarity as a given and see other trans people as their own community.
If your primary interactions with any group of trans people are negative, that is a choice you have made. We've all had negative interactions where we didn't expect them, but after a point, if you're constantly seeing the worst fringe takes from other demographics of trans people and little else, it's because you are actively seeking them out and/or choosing to join/stay in spacss where that's the norm.
When you do that, it becomes very easy to fall into the trap of becoming just as bad as them, and then your bigotry stings innocent people, which stirs resentment, and some of those people may also fall into that cesspit and become mean and bigoted where they otherwise wouldn't have. While it wouldn't be reasonable to expect endless grace and patience for people who are being cruel directly to you or causing serious harm to the community, it IS reasonable for the rest of us to expect you to remove yourself from spaces and communities where that's a constant problem rather than wallowing in it and becoming a bigot yourself.
Also, wallowing in hurtful rhetoric from people who are bigoted and hateful towards people like you is self-harm. Full stop. You are making a choice to engage in self-harm by looking at that stuff for hours a day. Knock it off and find a healthier coping mechanism.
PLEASE do yourself and your community a favor and start seeking out trans people with different experiences from you in spaces that are not all about discourse and bullying. They're out there. You can probably even find communities centered around unrelated interests with trans people who will happily bond with you over those interests.
