P O I S O N I V Y

this is entering my vocabulary. what the fuck even do in the polar

i love you archival work. i love you alphabetizing. i love you sorting. i love you reshelving. i love you document restoration. i love you shelf reading. i love you inventorying. i love you analysis. i love you archival work.

There's this video of nuns talking about their favourite things to do outside of nun activities and one of them says "ultimate frisbee" and the other one goes "and sister you are so good at that." I literally cannot get "and sister you are so good at that" out of my head. Out of all my stims this one is my fav lolol

please do not look up to me. I am 1 inch tall. I'm down here. if you look up you won't see me

I REALLY LIKE THIS ART THIS IS SO CUTE I'M BEING HELD UP

fucked that you can’t fix other people especially when you really care about them. Oh so im just supposed to be there for you while you suffer. like a useless cunt gargoyle

by the way it's fine to like sexual content just for the sake of it. "we can't ban porn because other stuff will get banned" "sometimes nude art has value" "the government will classify queer people as sexual" this is all true but it's okay to just like porn. its okay to not want porn to be banned because you like it.

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Ryan Gosling’s career has just been one long quest to climb the Warner Bros water tower

My liege im sorry to break it to you but your advisor that's actually evil and wants you dead turned out to be straight. I know you really wanted to have an enemies to lovers situation with him. Yeah I'm afraid the poisoning didn't hold any romantic intent behind it. The king of the enemy kingdom is bisexual though, I could send him a letter? Yes, I'll make sure to include multiple threats of homoerotic nature. You will have your toxic yaoi, my liege

pulling yourself up by your strap-on or whatever they say

this pride month we’re all going to be radically pro transgender. or else.

the next child safety act will be locking every child in a plain white room with absolutely zero stimulation inside to prevent any bad ideas being picked up by exposure to anything at all

All other horrors aside, I have to admit it's pretty fucking funny that JD Vance probably thought being trumps VP would get him respect.

Every passing day he just looks more and more like the mascot for a German chocolate candy company.

Some people age like fine wine, then there's Vance aging like late 90s CGI

I miss when vice presidents were made using practical effects.

No one would ever abduct JD Vance because it would mean having JD Vance. I bet his wife keeps dropping him off in strange locations and hoping he can't figure out how to find his way back. She tells everyone she's not married.

JD Vance inspires the kind of devotion that animals feel gnawing off their own limbs to get away.

He has an incredible physique, a neck that just screams out for being hanged at the Nuremberg trials.

Credit where credit is due, he probably inspired his mom to be pro-abortion.

JD Vance's wife spends all her time jealously scrolling Erika Kirk's single and ready to mingle social media feed.

His code name with the secret service is Meat Shield