Quarantine rlly got me
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@omgdonutstar
Quarantine rlly got me
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Heâs on his way to a job interview and heâs very nervous.
The struggle is REAL!
The Bus |Â Paul Kirchner | Via

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Based on actual events
Once again @everyone: REBLOG stuff you like!
And DONT REPOST stuff thatâs already here! WHY do we even have to go through this again huh? DONâT. DO. IT.
And if you share something from a different platform that isnât on tumblr already you ASK the creator for permission and then give CREDIT!
reblog, donât repost, this
Terminology reminder: reblogging is Tumblrâs in-site sharing system but REPOSTING is saving a picture from a post and then making your own post
I have seen genuine confusion about this in the past (largely from ppl more used to other sites that donât have a reblog system) thatâs the only reason Iâm adding the explanation
yea bud! i was on the grind nonstop for a few months until my body said haha watch THIS! and took me out of work for 3 weeks
Sometimes, it will take the rest of your life.
I canât stress this enough. I wish I could get through to everyone I know. If you try to organise and be productive with every minute of your day, eventually, your body will pull the rug out from under you in a dramatic fashion, and you may end up being able to do very little at all, in a world that has no sympathy for people who need to rest.
So rest now. And work on making sure the people around you know itâs OK to rest.
And donât feel guilty for resting. Practice telling yourself that rest - quality rest, where youâre not stressing about something you feel you ought to be doing - is actually a productive thing to do for your body.
You are an animal. You need to respect that animalâs needs. That includes laying about doing nothing as much as it does enrichment and running about.
Even your fucking computer gets overheated and slow if you donât allow it to shut down and update sometimes (which is actually a lot of what sleep does for humans, btw). You eve notice how sometimes your browser just crashes sometimes because you have too many tabs open, or one of the tabs is causing the whole machine to run slowly?
So donât tell yourself you want to work like a machine because guess what? Machines fucking fall over all the time if you overload them, try to do too many things at once, or donât let them rest.
Rest knits up the ravelled edge of care.
If you donât make time for your wellness, you will make time for your illness.
You all remember a time back before the pandemic and the threat of WW3 and everything being just really really awful back in 2019 when at the time things still seemed pretty damn awful but then Good Omens came out and it seemed like for at least a few months that Spring/Summer everyone was just happy and celebrating the gay angel and his demon husband and it made the world just that tiny bit better?
Our Flag Means Death is the post pandemic Good Omens. Thereâs a lot of darkness in the world at the moment, but my god does this show with its silly gay little pirate husbands do its part to shine some light on us. Pure Unbridled Joy.
I really think it was needed.

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âWhy should rich people pay moreâ because fuck âem
âSo you are okay for paying more when you have moneyâ I am not excluded from âfuck âemâ when relevant
âI am not excluded from âfuck ââemâ when relevantâ is surprisingly powerful as both a statement and philosophy
do they think we're only allowed to eat kraft singles or
i go to the american grocery store and step into the cheese isle pondering which kraft single i will buy
Everyone wants to act like Americans donât have cheese but no one wants to talk about the cheese caves, the caves where we put all our cheese because we make too much and our cringe government keeps bailing out our fail dairy farmers to keep the price of milk stable because The Great Depression so now we have so much cheese in this country we could literally stop producing cheese right now and still have enough cheese to give everyone in America a pound of it every day for four years. And Iâm not even talking about kraft singles pictured above, Iâm talking about an actual not cursed product-- real cheese. Cheddar, brie, gouda, munster, swiss, you name it we have a billion pounds of it, literally. We have so much cheese that weâre literally running out of places to put it and in an effort to get rid of it we reprocess a lot of it into kraft singles (hence itâs a cheese product and not actual cheese-- cheese is but an ingredient in kraft singles, much like how bread is itself an ingredient in German graubrot, although graubrot is a food item that is actually meant to exist on this earth and isnât the end product a cautionary tale on how not to stabilize a vital industry when your economy is collapsing) and for a very long time we gave it away as part of certain food assistance programs. And thatâs not even counting the fancy imported shit from Europe, because yes even though we still have way too much cheese we also still import it from Europe in addition to the too much cheese we already have.
#tell us where the cheese caves are#I want good sharp cheddar#get some Munster and Swiss#get some other cheeses to try why not via @malconvoker
The cheese caves are in Kansas City, Missouri I believe, though Iâm not sure how guarded they may or may not be.
thought this was something you guys were making up to gaslight the europeans only to find out the massive cheese caves are in fact, real.
what the fuck
guide 4 teens
tell the cops nothing
tell the paramedics everything
ur eyebrows are fine
Villain: âYou and I are very much alike, you know.â
Hero: âI realize that.â
Villain: âDoesnât that trouble you?â
Hero: âWhy would it? I share most of my genome with sewer rats.â
Villain: âBut our similarities mean that, deep down, youâre a bad person. Thereâs nothing stopping you from being just as evil as I am!â
Hero: âSure there is. Iâm stopping me.â
Villain: âBut in your heart you craveââ
Hero: âSometimes when Iâm in a crowded building I get the sudden urge to just boop a stranger right on the nose. But I donât do it, because that would be super rude and weird. Does having that compulsion in the first place make me just as much of a weirdo as if I had acted on it? Maybe it does in your eyes, but to the would-be boopee, it makes all the difference in the world.â
Villain: âWeâre not talking about booping noses, weâre talking about killing peopââ
Hero: âLook, dude, Iâm sure murder can be really satisfying. But Iâve decided that I donât want to murder people, and I think thatâs very sexy of me. Look at me. With a little self-restraint, you might have had what I have.â
Villain: âBut surely it disturbs you, doesnât it? To know how close you are to snapping. Donât deny it. Thereâs so much darkness in your heart. Do you really think theyâd still love you if they knew? Theyâd be disgusted by you. Theyâd hate you, for thinking so much like me.â
Hero: âThatâs the difference, isnât it? Between you and I. One tiny difference. Thatâs all it takes. Thatâs the line between good and evil.â
Villain: âWhat?â
Hero: âYou saw your own darkness and let it destroy you. You surrendered to it the moment you realized it was there. You threw open the door for it and welcomed it inside and let it rob you of your humanity without even a word of protest because you just couldnât imagine it was something you could fight.â
Villain: âAnd you, oh-so-sanctimonious one?â
Hero: âI said âno thanksâ. Thatâs it. Thatâs the difference.â
Villain: âDid you justâdid you justââ
Hero: âBoop your nose? Youâre right. It did feel good.â
Villain: "They would be disgusted if they knew"
Hero: "Most of my friends work retail, they all know that feeling of wanting to kill somebody and then not acting on it."

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fun fact one of the world champions in pepper-eating contests is a trans woman and she actually faced significant backlash because people somehow thought she had a biological advantage. to eating spicy pepper
update bc i went back and checked: her name is brianna âthe chilli queenâ skinner and she set a record in 2017 by slamming back 23 carolina reapers consecutively. she only stopped when told to by the referees, and the next year she stepped down out of boredom. queen
learned the interesting but frankly horrifying fact today that, since army ants donât have permanent nests, their queen has to travel around with them, but sheâs still basically just a reproductive factory and doesnât have any eyes so the regular ants have to lead her around like some kind of WH40K siege monster
kind of a milf. reblog