G'nevening!

posting on tumblr is risky because there's always a chance that your diary will undergo peer review

Not book smart or street smart but a secret third thing.

supid

supid.

love when ppl ask to see pics of my axolotl and are expecting something cute + pink + all smiles and instead with genuine fear in their eyes, and in their heart, say WHAT the fuck is that.

they should make a second car horn where instead of honking it says "i love you my beautifil friend the light is green please go" and a third car horn that says "hi grandma" for when you see your grandma while youre driving

der rewe wo ich praktikum mache stellt einfach den mate nicht kalt, wie soll man unter solchen zuständen überhaupt arbeiten

I don't remember finding fart jokes particularly funny even when I was a child.

Five year old me, watching a movie with fart jokes: "Oh, how gauche. They're pandering to the lowest common denominator."

Blue & Yellow Paint