Okay, So We're Doing This

religious

asking santa for something

Cats are not for everyone lmao. When I’m depressed and crying cats don’t give a shit. They won’t read your sadness or respond to it in a comforting way? They just ignore u..some ppl wanna cuddle with their pets without it trying to claw them to death. My bunny will cuddle with me for hours and never complain.

Also i think cats are so vicious and cold ..they never listen to you. Even for their own good.

My roomates cat jumps on counters, tables even walks all over the stove which is super dangerous

And when I was a kid a cat killed my pet bunny. chased it down while I was in my backyard and …yeah…

(An experiment: Try saying “I hate cats” in mixed company. People will either agree with you, or shrug and move on. Now try saying “I hate dogs” in mixed company. The response will be wildly different.)

(Another experiment: Try to imagine the “Dogwoman” equivalent to “Catwoman”. It’s kind of hard to imagine, isn’t it? Why is that? What is it about the way society views cats that makes it easier to imagine a female character associated strongly with cats than it is to imagine a female character associated strongly with dogs?)

Like, you’re right that cats are not necessarily for everyone. And pretty much everyone – even cat people – will tell you that, and that it’s okay to think that. But no one ever says that about dogs. Why? Because dogs are associated with the masculine – they’re “man’s best friend”, they’re automatically assumed to be male, associated with male stereotypes like strength, the sun, etc. while cats are associated with female stereotypes like being slinky, lying, being “catty” (no pun intended), the moon, etc.

I’m sure someone could do a much more in-depth analysis of this than I can – it’s late and I’m honestly struggling for words, but I know I’ve seen a much better post on this that actually dug into the history of when cats became associated with the feminine and such. But I had to try because dismissing this out of hand is kind of… awful? I mean, I know it’s not the biggest deal in the entire world, but it’s still an example of misogyny and the way things are gendered / the way that things that are gendered as “feminine” are degraded and considered lesser and expendable, while things gendered as “masculine” are more valued.

(Other things: The plight of dogs euthanized in shelters is portrayed as much more serious than that of cats. Men will refuse to own cats because cats are “a woman thing”. Adoption fees for dogs are much higher than those of cats. Dogs in shelters are treated significantly better than cats in shelters (this one is based on personal observation). Adopting a dog is seen as a much bigger deal / much more of a responsibility than adopting a cat. It is (rightly, don’t get me wrong) immoral and in many places illegal to force your dog to live outside, but no one cares about people forcing their cats to live outside, despite cats being arguably in much greater danger than dogs. “Crazy cat lady” is a derogatory stereotype used against single women; “Crazy dog lady” isn’t a thing that exists. In that vein, a woman who lives for her cats is considered a bad person or else mentally ill, while someone (man or woman) who lives for their dog(s) is seen as an awesome, great person. Etc. etc… it goes on and on. Saying “cats just aren’t for everyone” doesn’t even remotely account for the differential in the way cats and dogs are treated in society – but the fact that cats are associated with women while dogs are associated with men absolutely does.)

By the way? Every cat I have ever had has come to me when I cried, has played with me, has clearly and openly loved me. The stereotype of cats as cold and aloof is just that: a stereotype. It is not true. If you show love to a cat, it will love you back. Period.

I have two kittens now, and both of them constantly want to be around me and spend time with me. They follow me from room to room. If they’re not right next to me, they’re usually nearby, hanging out in my orbit. They certainly don’t ignore me – especially not when my monster kitten is walking along the back of the couch specifically to come headbutt my forehead and beg for attention and love.

As a child, my cat would let me bury my face in his fur and cry. (he was pretty big cat.) That cat’s little brother let me and my sisters carry him around like a baby, drive him in our doll baby strollers, even put him in doll clothing and he never striked either of us. He walked down stairs with us, and sat at the bottom waiting when we were learning to walk our steep af stairs.

And then Pete came into my life, and Janet–who died far too young last summer of FIP–and Ishka and Dent, and I’m like…. all that “cats don’t love you or care what you think” shit is total bullshit? Ishka and Dent literally come running to snuggle on top of me when I walk in the door, and Peter and my roomie’s cat Mr. Spock at least make sure they get to come check in and see who’s come in. Peter walks on a leash better, frankly, than some of the dogs I grew up with and wants to say hello to literally everyone he sees when we’re at the vets; he does come up and see me when I’m crying but tbh that’s mostly because he apparently thinks tears are delicious, but that’s okay because it makes me laugh a lot. 

All three of them come line up in a row when I’m in the shower to greet me when I wake up; Dent comes running at the sound of my alarm in order to obtain early morning pets and snuggles; all of them want to be part of my routines and obtain contact just as surely as my dog Tribble does. And to be honest, Peter in particular is probably more interested in human attention in general than my good dog Tribble is, because Tribble is an introverted one-woman dog who has accepted my spouse as a grudging second-best human, and if she’s not feeling social she couldn’t give less of a shit about literally the entire rest of the world. Whereas Peter wants to chirp at and say hi to and exchange breaths with literally everyone, and Dent wants to sit on everyone’s shoulder and purr happily into their ear and maybe lick them a little bit. 

At night, about twenty minutes after I turn out the light and snuggle in under my blankets, my cat jumps onto my bed, announces himself with a meow and wants to snuggle.

My cats like to let me know they love me, and not just for food.  Nadia likes to be picked up and held. She purrs the whole time.  Vache will sit at my feet and give me winky eyes and purr as I pet him.

Some cats are standoffish and some aren’t, and a lot has to do with how they’re socialized, same as dogs (just for example an inside cat will often be more comfortable around people in general than an outside cat though not always), but love and adoration of their people is usually not their automatic default.

Even if they regularly want to smother you in softness and purrs, when they don’t want to be around you, they won’t be around you. If you call them, they’ll come if they want to, but they don’t always 100% of the time want to.

Which isn’t to say that the usual YOU ARE THE BEST THING THAT HAS EVER HAPPENED TO ME OH MY GOD dog deal is better or worse. I frickin love the hell outta dogs. We’re talking about different temperaments (and there are a huge number of exceptions on both sides because bro, animals have their own individual personalities). But when people talk about that difference in temperaments in a way that disparages cats, I get this sense of resentment. As if cats aren’t delivering what they owe. As if cats should be constantly love-available and love-giving and they’re lesser creatures for not always being so. They’re “cold”.

Clark Kent:

And then he changes…

…into Superman.