Thats rad

ok well it has been real but i am going to kill you with a hammer now

I have been informed that the "adult dose" of 10mg listed on my pill bottle is 30 times the usual recommended dosage, so that might be why I've been trapped in the fifth dimension every night for the past four months.

you ever been 24 minutes into a 47 minute long youtube video and you're randomly like wait i dont care about this at all. and just leave

watch the fuck out. if your freak matches well enough you’ll both disappear like in tetris

he did a little dance and for this crime he was imprisoned in a bubble

They liked his little dance so much they gave him a spotlight

I love when kinky people are like “I’m such a freak in private. You’d never guess that in my normal life I’m a nerd who works in tech and plays DND.” Babygirl yes we would.

you should be ashamed

She was begging for a hit she was fiending, it would be more cruel if i said no

Capulets vs Montagues

Two houses, utterly devoid of dignity

Actually, as a cis woman who is a fujoshi, I plan on being the next communist dictator, so get fucked, OP.

A second best sentence has hit the twin towers

Would that I could turn back the hand of time and warn the onion staffer who penned this piece. “Is it worth it,” I would ask. “Is it worth it?”

truly a cultural reset

me in my animal crossing house after that fox has sold me another fake painting

Dude why are my pockets so wet (figures out im currently peeing myself) Ohhhhhhhh

It was me I shoved my dick in your pocket and pissed I'm sorry