take me to (cowboy) church

its kind of fun to uninstall programs you arent using to free up space and see them all beg for their lives

hello instagram artist. your challenge is to do a portrait study of a woman but you’re not allowed to stylize them so their eyes are really big and more cat eyed than the reference photo. You’re also not allowed to make their noses more of a button nose or their lips full and pouty or their faces heart shaped with no double chin. Also you have to draw a fat woman. one thats actually fat and not just slightly curvier than the kpop demon hunters body type. good luck

the ocean was made of sprite also

happy pride month dykes i love you dykes

no matter how normalised it gets I will die on the hill that it is rude to record strangers in public without their consent

but ykw at least i'm not on mount everest. at least i'm not paying tens of thousands of dollars to slowly suffocate in a 300-person line at the gates of hell. never in my life will i have to be steered in a hypoxic stupor through the maze of poop and corpses atop mount everest. on this earth a lot of horrible things can happen to you without your permission but there are a few that you have to opt into. you can just say no thanks! and be guaranteed never to have to be on mount everest. much to be grateful for actually

still not on mount everest this morning 😌 alhamdulillah

I wish people were as scared of getting into a car accident as they are of being true crime'd. Maybe then they wouldn't be on their phones while driving.

True crime girlies will be like "wtf I would never go for a walk at night, what if the hash slinging slasher gets me" and then use their knees to merge with no turn signal in front of a semi while applying makeup with both hands

brought tiramisu to the gun fight. and we are all setting side our differences to eat. tiramisu

IN WESTERN AUSTRALIA!!!

Reblog this to wrap the person you reblogged from in a blanket like a burrito

@wires-walter-the-automaton W HY DO I IMAGINE ACE MAKIGN THIS WHILE DRUNk

Because this is definitely something he would do! He would probably make it for Peter. Also, is that cheese?

i first thought it was butter fsr lmao ace would be on his knees begging peter to eat it, crying and all but peter keeps denying then gene comes in to save peter’s life by agreeing to eat it for him (because there’s no doubt in mind he wouldn’t) and luckily ace couldn’t hear them discussing the plan over his own sobbing ace then looks up and notices it gone, peter then shyly exclaiming “yeah it… actually was really good, i’m sorry ace” and ace is sO HAPPY he gets up to hug peter and peter hugs back, feeling bad for lying to his sweet spaceman but it was kind of worth it at least gene got his midnight snack bc it’s literally 2 in the morning

hey what the fuck are you talking about

oh my god they’re talking about the band Kiss

shut the fuck up

THEYRE TALKING ABOUT FUCKING KISS?

opened the comments on a post and tumblr somehow had a half written comment already autofilled from the last time I saw that post. which was at least two years and several computers ago. what does this site's back end look like

tumblr is going to gain sentience 100 years before any fuckass genAI comes close. this site runs on mold spores.