take me to (cowboy) church

i have [gestures vaguely] my tendencies

imagine getting accused of losing on purpose at the strip game but you’re really seriously trying your best

this fetish stuff is getting out of hand what the fuck is word play

was just thinking how nice it would be to swear fealty to someone

has anyone considered that it was probably her house too. where else was she supposed to put her chintz?

a CEO walks into his office “any messages?” he asks his assistant “two anons want to know who tom petty is and one just says ‘post your ballsack’” “got it. check my dashboard” “that skeleton gif you like is back again” he rubs his chin pensively “mm. reblog that”

i see people saying andy weir isnt good at writing female characters and i think that’s fair and true and should be said, but also. characters of any kind are not really his strength lets be real

“why did they change grace/rocky/stratt from their book versions!” “why did they cut out so much!” because otherwise the movie would have been sarcastic smart guy, sarcastic smart alien, and sarcastic smart dutch woman alternating between snarky quips and monologues on sci fi problem solving for 8 hours straight. which may have been fun but probably not a hit movie.

you gotta come to the club man drinks are $18 and were all on our phones googling dog surgery

tumblr is like an abandoned space station & you all are the thing in the vents

not me though. im girl with tanktop