house so empty need a centipede!!

telling the people paying 20k rent in NYC that central park is a good location for a data center as a form of psychological warfare

Lesbian girl named Rock Papers who....well, you'll never guess what she does

Barbeque

She barbeques Rocks & Papers

(to the tune of mary had a little lamb): mary had a little lamb

I had a dream that Jamie and I got trapped in a release copy of paper Mario the thousand year door. But the copy was also owned by a famous YouTube let's player. We tried to alter the course of history by warning the YouTuber via Ben Drowned type shit.

you’re dreaming about me because you’re obsessed + confuse me often with goombella

We have to warn the world about the 2008 real estate crash

you don’t realize how important lunch is until you’re wandering around thinking about how unloveable and untalented and uniquely cursed you are and then it’s 4pm and you finally eat lunch and you go Oh. oh right.

lot of people commenting on this post like "who eats lunch at 4pm that's a terrible time to eat lunch" yes. that is the point. 4pm lunch is inadvisable. 4pm lunch is not the ideal. 4pm lunch makes the mind demons real.

once i stop being really sick im gon a start attacking people for fun

hey girls ive got one. you know how they pronounced margaret thatcher back in the day