on the hiking trail | lofoten, norway
Stranger Things

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η₯ζ₯ / Permanent Vacation

Love Begins
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
i don't do bad sauce passes

@theartofmadeline
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ojovivo
YOU ARE THE REASON

Origami Around
Claire Keane

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@nettywerk
on the hiking trail | lofoten, norway

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I love how insane everyone is now.
I guess he doesnβt love the color of the sky :(
today i found out that victor hugo has had more sex than possibly almost any other human that has lived on this planet.Β
he had so much sex his biographers straight up gave up trying to document all of his sexual partners. he was reported to fuck up to 3-9 times a day. He had a secret sex diary written in code. He hadΒ βofficialβ andΒ βunofficialβ mistresses. One estimate was that he had ~200 sexual partners in two years.Β
Icon.Β
donβt forget that on the day of his funeral all the brothels in Paris were closed because every single prostitute in the whole goddamn city was busy mourning him
Hey quick question what the fuck
the man reported on his hookups in his diary using latin code words and 2 million people attended his funeral, if that isnt balling idk what is
victor hugo has been dead for 133 slutty, slutty years
RATING: π¨ MOSTLY RELIABLE π¨
Many articles make similar claims to those above. However, much of this information circulates without a clear source, and I have struggled to find reputable/high level sources for some of this information. Therefore, keep in mind that some of this may be exaggerated or potentially unreliable.
Obviously, I cannot account for the sexual of history of every human who has ever lived, but evidence does suggest that Victor Hugo had a⦠lively sex life.
From Medium: βSex was so involved in Hugoβs daily life that one biographer wrote the following while describing a typical day in Hugoβs life:
βIt was not unusual for him to make love to a young prostitute in the morning, an actress before lunch, a courtesan as an aperitif, and then join the also Βindefatigable Juliette for a night of sex.β
[β¦] Hugo claimed that on the wedding night, he and his wife had sex nine times.β
His encoded sex diary is referenced on Wikipedia, but when I found an English translation of the source, I couldnβt find where in it they were sourcing.
From Wikipedia: βHe systematically reported his casual affairs using his own code, as Samuel Pepys did, to make sure they would remain secret.β
The source is listed as: βHugo, Victor, Choses vues 1870β1885, p. 529, ISBNΒ 2070361411, pp. 371, 521 (n. 1).β
Iβve found Choses Vues here in the original French and here translated into English. If anyone can find anything in here about the encoded sex diary, please let me know!
His βofficial mistressβ is likely in reference to Juliette Drouet.
From EBSCO: βSince 1833, Hugo had maintained a liaison with a beautiful female actor, Juliette Drouet, who for twelve years followed a cloistered existence relieved only by six-week summer holidays with her lover.β
His βunofficial mistressβ is likely in reference to LΓ©onie dβAunet Biard.
From The Common Reader: βOverlapping was a seven-year affair with travel writer and Arctic explorer LΓ©onie dβAunet Biard, whose husband finally brought a police officer to the Paris hotel and caught them in flagrante.β
I have found articles that circulate the '200β claim, but none that give a source for the information.
From Medium: 'Not only that but he bedded 200 women in this hotel in just two years.β
The claim that brothels were closed on the day of his funeral is again circulated frequently without claim. The only sourced part of the claim I can find is a second hand report that sex workers had 'draped their gentials in black crepeβ.
From The Guardian: β[β¦] when Hugo died the brothels of Paris closed down for a day of mourning, allowing all the cityβs sex workers to pay their last respects to a loyal client. Literary critic Edmond de Goncourt claimed a police officer told him that sex workers even draped their genitals in black crepe as a mark of respect.β
And an estimated 2 million people attended his funeral procession.
From Funeral Conflicts in Nineteenth-Century France: 'Two million people came to see Hugoβs body lying in state at the Arc de Triompheβ
Heβs now been dead for 141 years, although 133 was correct at the time of posting. How slutty those years areβ¦ I couldnβt say.
Take a sip, babes
Remember when Lil Nas X beautifully explored his sexuality, seduced and killed the devil to the banger of all time, and instead of cheering on this openly gay and proud Black artist for his artistry and fighting back against respectability politics, suddenly said respectability politics was all the Queerest Place on the Internet cared about? Hm. Wonder what happened there.
Anyway I miss him and hope he's doing better with his mental health ππΎ

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forgot to post it here
Me when I rode my first 13" dick
HOLY FUCK I HAVENβT LAUGHED THIS HARD IN CENTURIES
skrillex's "bangarang" used to play
what now?
Silence unending, interurrpted occasionally by flo ridas "cant believe it"
guys this bedtime story is really scary can you tell me a different one
I'm scrolling Tumblr. I pause to watch a video of Amaury Guichon. He pours chocolate into a mold, then carefully removes the shape of a human head. There are time lapse clips of chocolate being formed into a body, limbs, and hair. As the final detail is finished, he steps back to reveal the figure of a beautiful woman, uncannily lifelike. He steps forward and places a delicate kiss on her lips. The figure, now a living human woman, stirs and looks around in wonder. Amaury Guichon looks into the camera with a wide smile and holds out his arms in presentation.
"Fucking chocolate guy," I mutter to myself before scrolling to the next post.

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"why suck a strap?" have we all forgotten the beauty of theatre? have we truly fallen so far as to think the mind mustn't be pleasured too?
accidentally wrote "maid of horror" and I think I'm on to something actually. new wedding role responsible for releasing a chainsaw clown into the chapel if things get boring

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