"I'm Like A Rotisserie Shithead!"

i feel so gorilla shaking door when i just want to be gorilla dancing exuberantly

my notifications are once again devolving into a spirited debate about the ethics of actions that could potentially make someone uncomfortable, and at risk of sounding like someone about to get a lot of irate anons I think we're frankly giving way too to much moral weight to hypothetical discomfort

the thing about discomfort is that it's an extremely nebulous category that can be triggered by virtually anything and that's far too broad a category to have any inherent moral quality to it. like. my mom was mad uncomfortable when I stopped shaving. that didn't mean I was doing violence against my mom it just meant she needed to get over herself. many such cases it must be said.

it’s weird that professional letters are supposed to start with “dear.” i don’t even call my mom that

my darling hiring manager. my springtime rose. if hired i will bring a strong work ethic to this position

mulder and scully are never on the same page relationship wise because he's always like. I'll kill for you. I'll die for you. do you want me to die for you? I'm gonna do it right now. meanwhile scully's like no thanks, could you have a normal conversation with me instead maybe? but he's already pointing the gun to his head

they should invent a service where you take away some of the moral ocd of a certain person you know and give it to someone else. no my dear tumblr mutual stop beating yourself up over that thought. my dear sibling however i think you should chew on it a little bit

terrifying when you watch a movie or a show or whatever & youre like that was fun but it felt a little redundant they didnt need to hammer the point home that much & then you go online & theres thousands of people going that was so weird i did not get it what did that mean google.com ending explained please?

Would you unseal the coffin of the legendary pervert?

why did you people come up with russian names for what is supposed to be a movie set in italy. what was the thought process here. why does she sound like she walked out of a tolstoy novel

wait I have one more story. there's a group of anti-abortion protesters who often set up by the Ethiopian cafe I hang out in, and when I was waiting to cross one of them held up an aborted fetus sign and said "how does this make you feel?" and I said "hungry", and then I was so satisfied by my own cleverness that I missed the lights and stepped off the sidewalk into oncoming traffic

hiii girls ! group howl AWOOOOOOOOO

AWWWWOOOOOOOO

some hyper famous artists like Van Gogh transcend overratedness and become underrated because they're so normalized. Like I'll look at a van Gogh and I'm like wait this really is amazing you guys don't get it

Shakespeare is like this

every day I see six new fully finished highly symbolic art pieces of eva stratt with a set of scales and lambs and foxes and petrova lines visually paralleling nooses / restraints / trails of blood and rosaries and halos and big dioramas of earth and the sun and the hail mary and different methods of execution and explosions and rocket launches and heavenly / hell fire and allusions to major works in the art canon and I weep for my stomach not being strong enough for me to print out and eat all of them