Naga

Like, just think about it for a second. Danny is in Gotham for college, or maybe he just moved out to find a city where having mad scientist parents isn’t actually that unusual.

He can see ghosts.

The ghosts know this.

Now he’s getting harassed left and right by spirits trying to get closure. Fine, whatever, most of them are a one-and-done type deal, and the amount of ghosts trying to get his help steadily decreases.

Except for this one very stubborn dog.

It just keeps showing up and leading him to crime scenes! He doesn’t know how many “anonymous tips” he can call in to the cops before they trace his phone! And this dog, this incredibly good boy, will not stop trying to help the city. He’s never met anyone with such a strong sense of justice, let alone a dog. Can dogs even have a moral compass?

And so Danny just accepts the fact that Ace isn’t going anywhere and becomes his reluctant sidekick/dedicated medium. He leans into the whole thing, dressing up in a mix of traditional magic-user attire and accessories that pay homage to the ghost dog.

He becomes somewhat well known. The psychopomp detective following around the shadowy figure of a German Shepard? That’s unusual! That’s weird! I mean, it’s not the weirdest thing in Gotham, sure, but he’s a new vigilante and he’s got a ghost dog that people can only see when it’s around him. Someone’s gonna notice.

Damian, as Robin, is the first to reach out to him.

Ace doesn’t know Damian but he does know a Robin, and while this isn’t his Robin, he’s still friendlier than usual. Danny’s panicking because oh god the bats are here and also is this kid gonna steal my ghost dog, Damian is absolutely delighted by Ace, and Ace is just happy to see a Robin again.

Damian decides that the psychopomp isn’t a danger to anyone, and there’s no reason to put this encounter into his reports, really, and perhaps Danny can help with some of his cases in the future.

Danny is sweating bullets because Damian basically tells him that he’ll keep him secret as long as he gets to play with Ace. Ace is happy that he’s finally getting some bat affiliated crime-fighting assistance.

And so, Danny is now both Ace AND Damian’s reluctant assistant. At least whenever he’s in trouble, he can always call a middle schooler to help him.

(Is Robin even in school? He’s out patrolling damn near every night, and he stays out late as hell. Does he have a bedtime? He should.)

Eventually it gets to the point where Damian is going over to Danny’s house. When he first sees it, he has a damn bitch you live like this moment, to which Danny responds that not everyone has the money to afford a nice place. Damian counters that he could at least take the time to clean up, and Danny replies that he’s working, going to school, and being a vigilante assistant to a ghost dog, something’s got to give.

Danny nearly has a heart attack when he checks his bank account the next day and sees that someone transferred him 10,000 dollars.

And so they get into a routine. Danny and Damian fight crime with Ace at night, and occasionally Damian stops by during the day to play with Ace and have Danny help with his homework.

(Damian is smart enough to do it on his own, but some of the instructions are written incredibly confusingly, and he would never admit to needing help to his family. Danny is just glad that the kid is in school and cares about his education, blissfully unaware that he’s basically emotionally adopted him.)

Damian is used to being in Danny’s company.

Eventually, when going over a case with the family, Damian absentmindedly remarks that he’ll have to ask Danny about some of the clues that they might be missing. Nightwing asks who he means and Damian makes a face like he just swallowed a lemon.

Cue shitstorm.

Who is “Danny?” Why is Damian willing to ask for help from anyone, much less someone outside of the family? Does he know who Damian is? Has Damian been compromised? What the hell is going on?

Damian now has to explain that Danny is the psychopomp with the ghost dog who he might have met hunted down while on patrol and conveniently not mentioned, but he’s not a bad person, really, and he lets him play with Ace, and he’s been quite helpful on certain cases due to his ability to talk to ghosts.

Bruce insists that the family meet Danny. Damian, hoping that he won’t just skip town the second he hears the news, relents.

Danny is surprisingly eager to meet the bats, considering his earlier fears.

Damian, blissfully unaware of what’s coming, sets a time and place to meet.

Once everyone is there, he gives Bruce the earful of a lifetime.

Robin is in middle school! Danny knows that there’s no way to stop the boy from going on patrol, but you could at least shift his schedule so he gets enough sleep on school nights! Does the Bat even know where he is half the time?! (No) And why isn’t he comfortable asking his family for help with both cases and homework? Did they ever even notice how much time he was spending at Danny’s house? If Danny was a bad person, he could have seriously hurt the poor boy! Shame on you!

Nightwing is mortified that Damian didn’t trust him enough to tell him about any of this. Red Hood is laughing his ass off, because yeah Danny is making good points but he’s also chewing out the literal Batman. Tim is recording the whole thing. Steph is delighted by the absolute gall of this Danger Twink™️, and already planning to add him to several groupchats. Damian is more embarrassed than he’s ever been in his entire life.

You, he points to Nightwing, did your academic life feel supported when you were a Robin? Nightwing is too stunned to speak. Red Hood, eternal shit-stirrer, says that oh, we all prioritized patrol over our education, that’s just how it is. Red Robin actually dropped out of high school to avoid distractions, did you know that?

Danny honest-to-god shrieks at this.

He finishes his angry rant and leaves, everyone too stunned to stop him.

And as it turns out, Tim wasn’t the only person recording the whole thing.

The entire internet is blowing up with Psychopomp The Danger Twink™️’s rant. People are taking sides. Things are getting messy. Red Hood literally admitting on-camera to previously being a Robin is somehow not the main focus here.

Eventually someone connects some dots from the video, as well as stories circling the internet about the psychopomp. A ghost dog named Ace, who is the literal only reason that the psychopomp is fighting crime at all, which seems incredibly fond of Nightwing and Robin.

A crime-fighting dog who wants constant attention from both the current and original Robin.

Oh my god, Ace the Bat-hound died and became a crime-fighting ghost.

Joker gets fed up with this little shit and his ghost dog stopping him from having fun. He hasn't managed a major crime in almost an entire year! He decides that This Is Has To Go. Now.

The next time he breaks out, he immediately goes into hiding in a safe house and doesn't leave at all. The goons that bring him supplies are not allowed to wear any clown paraphernalia or attack anyone within a 1 block radius - he is not taking any chances. He manages to find a website that sells anti-ghost weaponry and gets several guns and a bat express delivered to him.

Once he's fully equipped, he alerts his minions that it's go time. Brucie is having a party tonight, and he's going to be the main entertainment. Luckily for him, Danger Twink is even invited since the Gala has something to do about animals.

Joker gets exactly 1 hit in at the dog before he realises he Fucked Up. Danny was going easy on him this whole time. Mainly, it was out of respect to Bat's rules, as Ace got upset when he got too violent against the rogues, but also because it just wasn't necessary for him to put in much effort.

Mistake number one was bringing VladCo weapons to the party. Mistake number two was targeting the dog.

Phasing his spine from the c3 vertebrae down is non lethal so Danny is in the clear.

Damian: Why now?

Danny: Piece of shit got ghost hunting tech and nearly shot Ace. Which would have ended him. I might not kill. But doesn't mean I have to be nice.

Damian:..... Joker is very lucky you have already dealt with him them.

Jason: Holy shit! Is that his spine?!?!? I could kiss you right now!

Damian, who already likes Danny and sees him as family......

Damian: Only if you court him properly! I will not have you mistreating Psychopomp!!!

Dick: Baby Bat, shouldn't that be the other way around?

Damian: No! Psychopomp far kinder than any of you save Black Bat. Therefore he has my defence.

Danny: Nope! You aren't a good enough Dad to Robin for me to trust you with that information! Bye!

Batman:..... He really doesn't like me. Hm.

Robin:... I believe it is more that he has imprinted on me emotionally and feels protective of me.

Red Hood: Well! Good to know someone is willing to do shit like this to send a message! I approve!

Nightwing: Of course you approve. It was very right heads in a duffel bag of him really.

Red Hood: Nah. This might be worse honestly. I just killed em ya know? Joker is vulnerable now. And that ain't something that can be healed. The other rogues are gonna take advantage. Clown bitch is fucked.

Danny: When I was 14 I ended up having to be a vigilante for my city. With just my close friends for support. My sleep schedule was destroyed. My education suffered. I was fighting off Justice League level threats by myself. I managed to get shot sorted by my last year of high school. And managed to get my education back on track. But Robin? Has adult heroes. No child should be a hero. I accept that you can't stop them. But Robin should not be able to run as free as he does! Batman hardly ever knows where he even is! His education and future shouldn't be put at risk like this! His safety shouldn't be at risk like this! And if I have to take up the hero mantle again to ensure Ace and Robin are that bit safer? I guess I will. But Batman should be the one doing this. And he isn't!

Reporter:.... Justice league level threats?

Danny: Justice League Dark more specifically. Mad scientists mixing tech with occult. It went badly wrong. Doesn't help that they managed to take over the phone lines so no one could call for outside help.

Reporter: Huh. Any plans to take up your old moniker?

Jason: Do you think ghost lilies would be too on the nose?

Steph: No I think that's really sweet, You're both death adjacent Vigilante. I think a little Spookiness is more than Acceptable, Nay, I encourage it.

Jason: Did you just say nay? Who are you? Shakespeare?

Damian: No, no, no, that's hardly romantic at all. If you want properly, Woo him, you must pick flowers with an appropriate meaning. Personally, I suggest carnations. light red carnations convey admiration and adoration, the dark red carnations articulate the profound feelings of love and affection.

Steph: I think it's a bit too early for something like Adoration, or Profound Feelings Of Love. They haven't even started dating yet.

Dick: How about something that means friendship or hope for a good relationship?

Steph: Google suggests sunflowers, Alstroemeria, chrysanthemums, Zinnia, and Daf...

Damian: Don't just list flower names without Going over the full meaning.

I mean, Damian probably bounced it around a bit first. Or labelled it as a donation. To be a little shit to Danny.

Especially these two freaks

Tim: I think it's fun. He just sat down at breakfast, called B dad, and pretended he had been here the whole time as part of the family. I appreciate his commitment.

Damian: It is a bit insulting that he assumes we would accept his presence without question but he has acknowledged that I am the true blood son. He may stay.

Dick: Besides, we are due for a new brother.

Bruce: I don't mind providing for any child in need, but I am curious how he got into the manor.

Alfred: I saw him climbing through the old laundry chute. Before laundry machines were invented, dirty clothes would be sent to the outside cleaning house to be washed by hand in the tubs built in the far back. Your grandfather kept the chutes because Master Thomas liked sliding down them.

Jason: So what, we're going along with it then?

Bruce: Yes. Let's see how this plays out.

Danny: Good evening family! What are we having for dinner?

Jason: Hey little man, we're having lasagna.

Danny: Oh my favorite!

Danny didn't really just appear in the Manor, no, he was actually adopted by a Bat.

But then, the Flash happened.

One of the Flashes changed something in the past, a domino effect just kinda erases Danny's existent from them and because Time Shenanigans don't affect Danny due to the time medallion that was kinda fused in him, Danny was not effected by the change.

Oh, they're quite the artists!

Do you remember this classic Squidward moment:

I didn’t know if it existed and certainly never expected to see it

BUT BEHOLD

HONEST-TO-GOODNESS CANNED BREAD

I have no idea how this ended up in the Ohio food pantry I was volunteering at but they said I could have it

Now, this is marked as ready-to-serve, but there ARE instructions for heating up and even baking it. But of course we need to try multiple options to get more of the experience. Interestingly, the instructions SPECIFICALLY say to open BOTH ends of the can. You are also advised to use a spoon if the bread proves recalcitrant.

As the can opens, I begin to see why; it is clearly In There.

So regarding my first reactions, there is an… interesting aroma. Very rich, hauntingly familiar yet somehow foreign. Where HAVE I smelled that before…?

Oh well lets get it out!

The bread was indeed happy in its can and Not Having Any Of That with just the spoon, so I was forced to take extreme measures and run a knife along the inside. BEHOLD THE TOWER OF CANNED BREAD! On a positive note, the can lines make excellent cutting guides.

Time to taste! I admit to some hesitance. WHAT IS that smell?? It’s so FAMILIAR and yet makes me wary! I am getting flashes of old homestyle cooking and pioneer theme parks.

Oh right. Maybe I should check the ingredients list.

So it turns out this canned marvel consists of, among other things, mostly molasses and rye wheat. And baking soda! That’s right, friends, we are looking at a log of pure heftiness in terms of flavor profile. It is sweet and moist and yet somehow also savory and utterly drying. I immediately require cherry 7UP. My friends, I can confirm that if you like molasses, THERE IS DEFINITELY MOLASSES. The texture is very soft and, again, moist; if I had been presented a slice of this at a church benefit dinner, I would have called it some type of cake (then possibly politely nudged it to the side of my plate).

Now, research (aka my aunt googling it at the food pantry) suggests this is indeed one of those polarizing foods—if I remember correctly, one source predicted that you will either love it of have an instant hatred, and that it has been known to cause sharp family disagreements. I believe this to be accurate, as while I would not say I HATE it, I’m reluctant to eat the whole slice and can confidently place it on Weird Things To Try Only Once.

But that doesn’t matter, because this is FOR SCIENCE, and there are INSTRUCTIONS WE MUST FOLLOW

I’m unsure how splitting of the loaf (for lack of a better descriptor) would affect cooking times, and I do not have a toaster oven besides. So we will be popping this whole baby (minus one slice) in the oven and then trying it out with and without some cream cheese.

Mmm canned bread burrito.

I will be DELIGHTED if this crisps it up like a more traditional bready crust, but I am reserved in my hopes. Regardless, I shall report back later!

First, I have to say that the smell of bread baking apparently does ALWAYS smell good, regardless of the type of bread. My kitchen smelled lovely.

The molasses scent reasserted itself the instant I opened the tinfoil, but oh well. I grabbed my cream cheese and my apricot jelly and headed to my desk for the unveiling.

So first thing I noticed (besides the odor de molasses) is that it looks EXACTLY the same! Probably because of the tinfoil, or maybe this kind of bread just can’t form a crust, idk I am not a baker.

I then cut a plain slice, because again, for SCIENCE, we must try multiple avenues here. 

Verdict: It tasted… pretty much the same as before going in the oven? Very sweet/savory and moist and with that bitter rye flavor that some people like (I do not). But it was warmer, and that definitely had a positive effect. Most things that taste a little funny generally taste better at something other than room temperature, though. ESPECIALLY if it comes from a can. I ate one bite and did not feel compelled to experiment further down that road, so I just added the cream cheese spread (plain) to the piece and took my next bite.

Verdict: Okay! Now we’re getting somewhere! This is a nice balance - the sweet creaminess pairs well with the savory tones of the bread! I could finish a slice of this!

Now let’s add some jelly (apricot) on this bad boy:

Verdict: Nice! Nice! Refreshing balance! Ate two slices before rye aftertaste became too powerful. This is a very filling little bread, though, so I was satisfied. Overall River (that’s me) Rating: 5/10. To be fair to the bread, I am not a fan of rye OR molasses (or other bitter flavors, like coffee or dark chocolate). But to be fair to ME, my and my aunt’s google searches suggest that this food often forms Strong Opinions in both directions, but especially if you are from Massachusetts (possibly Boston specifically), which as far as I can tell is the only place in the whole U.S. that knows about and sells this stuff. They also eat it with beans and hotdogs—it actually says so under the heating instructions (which I missed, but I just ate spaghetti and do not want to open a whole can of beans, so some other brave non-MA soul can try that if they so desire.)

In conclusion: If you like strong, savory/sweet flavors like rye and/or molasses, you may enjoy this! I didn’t think it tasted particularly “canned” (although there were some flecks that MAY have been pieces of the can caught by my knife removal technique). It has a cakey texture that I did not find unpleasant. But if you dislike such flavors wholesale, or just feel an uncontrollable aversion to anything that bears the same shape as cranberry sauce freshly removed from the can, you may want to abstain.

[For Comparison:]

This was fun to try, though! Thank you for coming on this journey with me, and remember, don’t be afraid to try new things sometimes! =D As for the rest of the loaf, I have foiled it up again and plan to give it to my oldest brother, who historically likes rye AND molasses (and every single other food in the world EXCEPT, for some reason, marshmallows).

Bonus: Stormy finds the canned bread uninteresting. But she is a cat, so her opinion should always be taken with a grain of salt.

(Btw, I have been informed that I misspoke previously: Canned Bread is actually a NEW ENGLAND tradition, not just Massachusetts and/or Boston. This also led to me coming to learn that “New England” refers to SIX STATES COLLECTIVELY. Idk whenever I heard “New England Patriots” my brain would just go, “Yeah, New England, that’s definitely A State In These Uniteds” and move on without closer consideration. I am 33. NEVER STOP LEARNING)

So we used my parents’ kitchen since my brother was there working on the alpaca farm (btw we have a family alpaca farm!) I brought a plethora of ingredients, some of which I already tried but thought my bro would want to give a go.

While the beans (and sliced hotdogs, of course) heated up on the stove, we popped the bread in the microwave (it’s still quite moist after several days in the tin foil!), and Brother sampled the bread.

Verdict: “VERY MOLASSES.” So we concur on this point. He liked it, though! Cream cheese and then jelly were applied, with the opinion about which one he preferred being, “I always like jelly.”

Next, we tried butter, which I hadn’t tried yet, so we tackled this new frontier together. (For technicality’s sake, we used Country Crock margerine spread, but it’s delicious and was always butter to me growing up so THERE)

Verdict: YUM! Guys, for real, the butter is great! My niece also tried a piece later and summed it up nicely: “The bread makes the butter taste MORE salty!” These two pair VERY well together, so much so that I willingly ate another piece. Highly recommend this method if you are trying canned/brown bread! Brother also concurred that this was tasty!

Now came the time for the most dubious-sounding of recommendations: Baked Beans on canned bread. I’ll admit, though, that after the pleasant butter experience, I was feeling less dubious; I think my taste buds finally realized this was a Bread, and I have enjoyed bread in beans before.

Verdict: You know… it’s not bad! Not my favorite ever, although I did eat the whole slice. Brother found it very satisfying: “It mellows the bread” were his words, I believe. This seems accurate, because the bread is very strong, but the beans and sauce do a nice job of balancing it out. (I know I use that word a lot but I don’t know a ton of fancy chef critic words. Plus it fits!)

As our test drew to a close, I pressed Brother for his overall rating on a scale of 1 to 10. After some consideration, his response was, and I’m approximating here:

Brother Rating: “8.7456684.(yes, another point)238…”

(He is a very ridiculous individual, as you can no doubt tell from the next photograph, which I asked if I could post since his face might get spread everywhere. His response (which was valid, as he doesn’t use tumblr) was, “It’s really whether YOU care, I’m probably never gonna see it.”

And that concludes our final (I think) entry in the Canned Bread Journey! Brother quite enjoyed it in all its forms! I found it most palatable with spreadable butter, it’s very homey. My niece concurs that it tastes nice with butter, although my nephew tried it with and without butter and made THE FUNNIEST scrunchy face. XD So yes, this is gonna be one of those dishes you either like or you don’t.

Thanks for joining us and for all the nice comments and tags! :D I don’t know how to close this out now, so, HAVE A GOOD ONE

.

It started with Dick pondering about the whole "secret identity" thing as a young Robin. The news are partially about Brucie Wayne, young dad extraordinaire setting an example for all reformed rakes turned fathers.

Then half of it is about speculations on Batman's true form — because while they all could've sworn that Batman was, well, a man... most investigators are hesitant to consider him human now because suddenly there's a toddling colorful child creature bobbing along after the living legend, with the same moves and capabilities as the Bat

Dick gets the brilliant idea to make Bruce into it

"Think about it!" Dick said on that first patrol, "People won't think too harsh on Batman if they figured that I'm just your little cub who is also made to fight crime, instead of a human kid out on the streets at night."

Bruce narrowed his eyes, but there's no harshness in his gaze. He's looking at this little boy, with messy curls of black and the sweetest shade of blue in his eyes. A reflection of him. How cruel it is of this boy to play with his feelings.

"You want people to think that the Batman is a creature that can give birth?" Bruce repeated carefully.

"More than that! I want them to think you're my mother!"

"...same thing."

"Bleh!"

.

It works as Dick proposed. Lesser ties made to Bruce Wayne, a cisgender man who can definitely not give birth, to Batman, a creature that allegedly birthed Robin. Bruce thinks it's the stupidest solution to a common problem, and he made Brucie.

But it works so they let the story run wild. Bruce doesn't mind so much as the weird, hungry, curious gazes that some villains and thugs give him.

Dick seemed to find it hilarious when ladies stopped Batman in the streets to tell him to rest because "you just gave birth!!"... only until said people also tell him to "respect your mother!"

Overall, it was just another one of those weird things a vigilante resorts to for the sake of operational efficiency...

...

Until one time, Robin had gotten captured in a ship rigged to blow, and villains left and right were hitting him everywhere.

Batman had priorities on the other side of the docks. Robin just had to distract everyone else, and this was a distraction technically. But everything hurt and some of the older men were looking at him funny and he can't move and he wants to go home.

"MAMA!" Robin shrieked into the night.

And descended from the shadows was the Batman, in all his apparently motherly glory — towering above 6 feet, maybe more, because animals grow their appearance when preparing to pounce. A culmination of darkness and rage. Armed to the teeth with weapons and artful precision.

His white eyes turn to a bloodied, shaking young Robin, then to the rest of the fools who dared breathe his boy's air. The sound of rage he made was not human.

Every move is calculated and efficient; not with the aim to kill, but to make an example of the bastards who dared hurt his little bird.

.

This story will be passed along the underworld of Gotham for years to come as more and more of the Bat's brood grew

And this secret will be inherited from Robin to Robin, Batgirl to Batgirl

Bruce is a father — providing, stern, careful

But Batman? They each came from his symbol, his cloth, his rearing. And Batman is a much more violent creature when it comes to protecting those who have his mark.

It explains why no one questions when Robin becomes Nightwing and everyone knows that hiding is the best possibility after Robin's death.

That the new Robin isn't the same but Batman's doting, smothering presence over him keeps him from dying like his previous sibling. There's a nervousness when Robin suddenly turns blonde and after the dust from the gang war settles, Robin is back to being a dark haired child. Batman's lack of grief driven insanity makes everyone think that Robin was going through a phase.

And then Red Hood shows up and is as dramatically grief driven and mad as Batman was and anyone who listens to the rumours can figure out that Hood is the Robin who died, who has somehow climbed back into the hell hole that is Gotham, that Batman doesn't know what to do with the child who is so like him it's like looking in a mirror.

Guess I have to info dump now.

I choose the yolk, because I like runny yolk. I love sunny side up and poached egg and soft boiled eggs. I love those eggs cause the yolk is runny. I like spreading it on bread or mixing it in in rice and all of that.

But, if it's hard boiled egg, then I'd choose the white part. Cause the yolk is not runny, it's dry and it makes me cough. It's a texture nightmare, eating it without water at hand is absolutely horrible.

favourite animal(s)??

mine are: cheetahs and raccoons

@chxmamire-guu @angelicflurries @ultimate-fashion-designer @ottxrpopz @sk1nnylikefel1x

Red foxes and tigers

otters!!!!! 🦦🦦🦦🦦

albino raccoons and lynxes :p

@rott-y @cosmiccomrade @cy-more-like-cry @bringmethatfuckinghorizon420 @illkmsisweargottermed

Snow leopard and crows!! :3

CAPYBARAS, cats, and frogs

cats and ferrets <3

An animal lover at heart though not at practice? Cause I'm scared of animals and I don't want to hurt and scare them away...

(I love this. The last time I did this is on wattpad, snd by God that makes me feels so old... though I was like 8-9 that time??? Dunno...)

As for tags ummm....

@drazhaq cause I really like your arts so now I wanna know what kind of animal you like

@deadgirldreaming if you don't mind🥺🥺🥺

OUTFIT FUN #1