The shadow hands of god.
YOU ARE THE REASON
Mike Driver
Not today Justin

tannertan36
Peter Solarz
we're not kids anymore.
Today's Document
noise dept.
ojovivo

if i look back, i am lost
Claire Keane
Keni
Sweet Seals For You, Always
One Nice Bug Per Day
Game of Thrones Daily
Acquired Stardust
AnasAbdin
Aqua Utopia|海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
Monterey Bay Aquarium
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@nekomuse
The shadow hands of god.

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For those who needed to hear it today
Two things:
1) I once heard someone say „You’re not ugly, you’re just not your type“ Love that!
2) You‘re perfect for someone out there. I know „we“ tend to go „why do they have a partner looking like that? And here I am single!“ which is negative self talk and you’re better than this!
2.5) I know beauty gets associated with our faces a overwhelmingly, but try and find a part of yourself you like.
I for example love my stretch marks/scars on my hips and breasts. I loved them when they came in when I was a teenager and I still love them today. I like my sun spots, they make cute constellations on my skin (Some on my arms make the great wagon 😊).
Do I love my entire body? No. But I focus on the parts I like. This didn’t just happen one day and it’s fine to not be happy with yourself, just don’t let the unhappy thoughts overshadow the parts of yourself you love.
can we have ma , pa kent and the rest or the super fam's reaction to timkon baby . its just been so stuck in my mind little baby
Pa, holding the baby: So this is our great-grandson?
Clark: No, Pa, not-
Pa, glaring at Clark: This is our great-grandson, Clark. Our great-grandboy.
Clark: He has Conner's DNA and Tim's, he's like Conner was, not really-
Pa, adamantly: I'm a farmer, Clark. I know all about DNA and genes and I got to say, he's got my nose. Like you did.
Clark: Sure, pop.
Ma, holding her great-grandson: You remind me so much of your grandpa. But you won't chew on my vacuum cleaner, won't you? No, you won't, because your mommy is so clever, isn't he? Tim, dear, have another cookie.
Tim, full to bursting: Mrs Kent-
Ma: You know full well that it's Ma. And you need your strength. Now, once you're done your cookies, you go have a lie down, you hear?
Lois, eyeing Clark pushing a pram: Did you fuck Bruce Wayne again?
Clark: Oh my god Lois, Dick is not my biological son, put away the red string, you didn't connect the dots.
This made me think about how much of an absolute menace a TimKon baby could actually be. Tim’s intelligent curiosity + Kon’s kryptonian genes could actually result in Gotham finally imploding in a good way
thats just what uncles are like
Tim: How did none of you hear what I just said?!
Cassie: I've been zoning out for the past 30 minutes. Who has a 2 hour wrap-up meeting?
Cissie: I got distracted halfway through.
Bart: Wasn't paying attention from the start.
Tim: ...
Kon: Don't worry, Babe, I was listening!
Tim: Thank you. At least one person understands how important these meetings are. You can catch everyone up on what they missed while I report back to Batman.
[After Tim leaves...]
Bart: You didn't actually hear a word he said, did you?
Kon: Nope, was staring at his ass the whole time. But I wanted to make Tim feel better.

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My sister and I are both re-reading Skip Beat and we were talking about how funny it is in the Beagle arc when Sho sees Ren angry for the first time and is like “Kyoko thinks he’s so kind and thoughtful but he actually has a dark side, she’s so naive she has no idea what she’s getting into” meanwhile Kyoko’s like
Dannys Crash Out Continues
dcxdp fic (Here for part 1 Here for part 2) can be read as a stand alone.
*a coffee shop AU written by a real barista that's really crashing out*
Danny was not having a good day. Which, wasn't unusual in the grand scheme of things, but was compared to how well things had been going recently.
The day had started well enough with classes and definitely not saucy texts shut up Sam with the hot guy he had been sorta seeing.
and then he got to work.
and the floors were sticky.
and not just sticky, but tacky.
and so were the mats.
every part of the floor behind bar was covered in syrup.
and now so were his shoes.
and the MOD just kept moving it around with a mop head she hadn't changed out in weeks, ass crack on FULL display (as per usual), and with water that was neither hot, nor soapy.
And Danny couldn't do an Observants cursed thing about it.
Eventually, he caved and threw two wet wipes down to stand on to at least clean his shoes before he went on break.
and for 2 whole minutes he felt relief.
and then the lights flickered.
and then the power went out.
then it came back on.
and then went off. and stayed off.
And Danny wanted to cry.
They weren't allowed to close.
They couldn't leave.
And they couldn't open any fridge or freezer in the cafe.
So no food. Nothing with milk or whipped cream. And they had to manually keep track of all transactions to make sure the drawer was correct at the end of the night and so that stock was appropriately accounted for.
The MOD went on their break.
Danny narrowly refrained from committing a felony. narrowly.
He eventually decided to just clean the floor since it didn't look like his manager was coming back any time soon.
He's about half way done and his manager decides to reappear.
and, while he had a bucket full of steaming floor cleaner, a scrubber mop, and a box a paper towels, ask him what he was doing.
"cleaning the floor?"
Apparently, that was the wrong answer.
Danny wanted to go home.
Or at least phase shift the floor under his managers feet enough that she fell.
or get a text back from the hot guy he definitely wasn't seeing and definitely didn't care that he hadn't texted Danny back. Danny was chill. He was like ice.
the power came back on.
Danny sprinted to clock out for his meal like Skulker had just invented a new piece of Halfa Hunting tech he wanted to "test run".
He pulled out his lunch, put it in the microwave, punched in the time, and watched in horror as the power went out and the little light in good ole' Chef Mikey went out with it.
Danny went to remove his lunch from the dead microwave and found that it needed power to unlock and open.
and there were two other people in the small break room so he couldn't just phase it out. And after the last time the manager had caught him fixing something he was on strict orders not to mess with any equipment (he secretly thought they were just mad that Batman wouldn't let them fire him for the whole shooting thing. but whatever).
He sat down and thumped his head on the table.
Gotham was still better than Amity Park. Gotham was still better than Amity Park. Gotham was still better than Amity Park. Gotham was still better-
Still no text notifications on his phone.
-Son of a-
Danny's Crash Out pt 2
dcxdp fic (Part 1 HERE part 3 HERE)
*a coffee shop au written by a barista thats havin a time this holiday season*
Danny couldn't believe it.
Things were going good, well, as good as they can in Gotham for a half dead food service employee. His coworkers were showing up to their shifts (or had been let go), he got the Hot Guy from the shoot outs number and they had been talking. Batman had even pointedly reminded the owners of the coffee shop that Danny had saved them with his quick thinking and that firing him for 'misuse of company property' and 'destroying proprietary machinery' was ridiculous.
There may have been threats about an IRS audit or checking into their paperwork or something.
Danny didn't really know. Didnt really care. Things were good for a half dead Gotham barista.
Until Star walked in. With her two year old.
and then an off duty (or former, Danny didnt really know) Agent K.
and it was like the flood gates opened.
Suddenly his past was there, in front of him, haunting him, taunting him.
He ran into Mr. Lancer at Wawa.
Kwan at Dollar Tree.
He was getting nervous, anxious. too many people knew he was here. He had wanted to start over. Away from everything. Everyone. Away from ghosts and people that knew his parents and the trappings of being a half dead teenage superhero.
away from-
dont go there Danny. Even if they knew you were here, they have no reason to find you.
no reason to come looking.
He squashed the half thought out ill concieved wisp of apologies and reconcilations and could've beens and might've beens and focused on the task at hand. and the fact that the cute boy he was kinda maybe sorta seeing had just walked in and grabbed a seat, waiting for him to get off shift so they could go on a lunch date.
He caught Tim's eye and relaxed, felt himself smile the smile of a love stricken idiot.
It was perfect.
He just had a few more guests to get through and he was outta there.
"Hey how are we doing today?" he said without looking up as he finished wiping the counter down.
"Fine and yourself-" no. it couldn't be.
-
Tim was on Cloud Nine.
He had just tied up a case that had been bugging him for months and everyone involved was either in jail or safely back home.
Bruce and Clark had been sighted looking extra cozy in what they swore was a totally platonic and work related interview. (they were both beet red and refused to meet anyone in the eye)(Alfred was over the moon).
Jason was alive. Angry and violent sure. but alive.
Damian was down to only one stabbing a week which was celebration worthy on its own.
And Tim had met a cute guy.
A brilliant normal snarky cute guy who didnt try to limit his caffine intake and, infact, encouraged it. A cute guy who was able to reprogram a notoriously finnicky espresso machine on the fly and take out not one, but two Men with Guns AND get all the customers out safely-prioritizing the most at-risk first (and arranging to have them picked up if they didnt have a safe way home).
And Cute Guy (Danny) liked HIM. and not cuz he was a billionaire. (guy didnt even recognize him at first. and, upon finding out, didnt care-finding out had actually turned him off and Tim had had to do MAJOR damage control to get back in his good graces. Apparently he had a Thing about rich people.)
Danny was normal. (if one counted being an unhinged engineering genius as normal). As far from being a vigilantee as one could get. He was snarky, and brave sure. but there was a-nervous?- energy about him. Like one would see in a rescue animal. Danny was always looking over his shoulder, keeping his distance. Ready to bolt at a moments notice. But he wasnt a coward either. inspite of his nervousness, or maybe because of it, when backed into a corner, he wouldnt just cower, he would go full crazy and start biting.
Even Damian liked him. or at least tolerated him. Danny had been walking a dog (Not HIS dog as he insitently repeated, the dog was a free spirit and occasionally showed up wherever Danny was for cuddles and walks before disappearing again.)
(Tim was almost certain the dog was a meta or science experiment or alien or something, even apart from the fact that it was so green it almost glowed-Danny tried to say it was dyed but the lie would have been obvious to even the most socially inept person alive. it was way to strong for a puppy, and could find Danny -anywhere-) well the dog had been walking him, and Danny had fallen flat on his face. In front of Tim and Damian. and before doing anything else, Danny had rushed to make sure the pup was alright.
and when a bunch of out of town paparazi tried to get an embarassing picture of Damian, Danny had ~appeared~ from seemingly nowhere, made a bunch of ridiculous commentary and somehow managed to shame them into deleting their sim cards. and when Damian tried to call him a fool for trusting them to delete them, Danny handed him a handful of memory cards, presumably taken from their cameras, though neither of them had any idea how the barista had managed it, neither saw him get anywhere close enough to the cameras, or photographers.
And when Damian had tried sneak attacking Danny. Danny had ducked and flipped him over in one, single, fluid motion. Landing Damian squarely on the ground. Danny had then recognized him, apologized, and never mentioned it again. which was prbably the only reason Damian had been mildly impressed instead of angry.
Suffice to say, Danny was a Normal, albiet mildly insane, guy. Fairly predictable once they spent a little time with him. He brushed off pretty much everything. Moving through life unphased by even the craziest things Gotham had to throw at them. Even amongst the skittishness and mild paranoia.
Which is why Tim, currently sat so he could make heart eyes at his almost but not quite boyfriend while waiting for him to be done his shift, was currently capital C Concerned. Danny's face had lost what little color it had, his hand gripped the marker it was holding tight enough that Tim could see it bending ever so slightly. Tim watched as his eyes flickered over and met his. Danny seemed to settle, his face going carefully blank as he finished the transaction and passed it off to his coworker. Tim watched as Danny turned and said something to a coworker who nodded in response before taking off his apron and hat and walking away.
Tim got the hint and carefully gathered his things, keeping the customer that had shaken Danny in his peripheral vision. A part of him (a very large part) wanted to call Oracle- find out who the person was, their connection to Danny.
But then what? Confront Danny with the information? Track the person down and confront THEM?
And what would that say about him? Tim Drake. That he was just some obessed billionares son who used his connections to cyber stalk/illegally gather information on the man he was trying to romance? (outside of the standard, completely legal, background check Alfred had run, and that Tim had told Danny-red faced- about. of course). Danny wouldn't forgive him. He had understood Tim's pseduo grandfather checking on the guy his grandson was inamored with to make sure it wasn't a gold digger situation, but had made his distrust of the ultra rich clear, and Tim wasn't going to cross that line. He wasn't. Really.
There was Danny. Tim straightened up, smiled, grabbed the crook of Danny's elbow, and led them both away from the cafe. Where, conviently, Alfred was waiting for them in the drivers seat of their most inconspicuous car, a fake Lyft sticker in the rear window to really sell the bit.
Danny's Crash Out
dcxdp fic idea (part 2 HERE part 3 HERE)
Danny barista AU except it's written by an actual barista who's actually crashing out (its me. im the barista)
Danny was having a DAY. It was his last shift before he was going back home to visit Sam and Tucker for a few days and it was, to put it mildly: shit.
It had started a few days ago when a rogue attack had taken out two of his coworkers. Then the delivery was late and when it finally showed up but half the food was either expired, expiring, or missing. They over shipped napkins and sleeves but Clockwork forbid they sent small cups. Then two days ago one of his remaining coworkers decided they "weren't feeling well" and went home, only to be online later that day posting pics of their makeout session with their partner and a bong they were ripping.
Then the oven started smoking.
The espresso machine started leaking.
The remaining coworker kept correcting him. loudly. in front of patrons.
The coworker was. in fact. spouting nonsense.
A cup broke, spilling an entire caramel machiato all. over him. and the counter. and the floor.
He closed his eyes. sighed. chuckled and cleaned it up. Started to remake the drink. handed it off to his coworker. grabbed a wet wipe. and went to the back to clean up. he looked around. and briefly went intangible, just enough to clear the milk that happened to get past both his apron AND his shirt, and the bit in his socks. He went back out.
His coworker got a phone call and 'had to leave' taking the contents of the tip jar with them.
Danny stared after them. Then looked at the next customer.
The next customer looked at Danny, looked at where the coworker went and then looked back at Danny.
"Did they just-"
"yup."
"are you gonna-
"Nope. What can I get started for you."
"Just a quad shot over ice in a medium cup, six pumps white mocha splash of heavy cream and a pump of raspberry syrup if you have it. They really just watched you get covered in milk and espresso, took a phone call, stole all the tip money, and bounced?"
"Yup. That'll be $8.95"
"And you're ok with that?" The guy asked as he tapped his card on the machine.
"Man, that's like, the least shit thing that's happened today, let alone this week. Also, not the first time they've done that and probably won't be the last. I've taken to presplitting them when they're on break so when they inevitably take everything they're not getting everything everything." Danny said as he started queing the shots and threw ice and the white chocolate into the cup. the espresso machine leaked. Danny glanced up, no one had a good angle on him. He slipped his arm into the machine and tinkered. The water stopped leaking. He added the raspberry and heavy cream.
"-fucker. Imma kill you for that-"
Danny's head snapped up just as he went to hand off the drink. The guy made an aborted motion to grab it as he too turned to the sudden commotion.
They both saw it at the same time.
"Get down""Gun"
The Gothamites in the cafe dropped in unison. Danny looked around. He put his arm back through the espresso machine and riffled around, then he scooched over to the coffee brewer and fiddled with the hot water component.
Muffled yelling was heard
"Anyone close enough to push the condiment table in front of the door?" Danny called over the counter. Silence. Then shuffling. Then finally the sound of a heavy object being pushed across a tile floor. "Cool. That'll buy a few seconds and should stop at least two. maybe three bullets outright and slow down at least four to five more. Anyone call the cops?"
Silence.
"Ya. That's fair. Anyone able to signal one of the bats?"
Some whispering. The noise outside was getting louder and more agressive.
"Ok, if you can, start to make your way back here, kids first, then anyone who cant move fast. We're gonna try to go out the back, alright?" something hit the door. He heard shuffling and saw a 14 and 12 year old crawl behind the bar.
"ok, we gotta stand to get there so we gotta move fast, you have a safe place to go from here?" the two nodded.
"okay, I'm going to go first, make sure the ways clear, wait 15 seconds and then follow it's about 11 steps straight back then a sharp right 9 steps and then the door. got it?" more nods. Danny crouch scuttled to the door to the back pushed it open and then stood and quickly made his way through the back clearing as much of a path as he could in the process. Exactly 15 seconds later the kids were behind him, he unlocked the security door and ushered them out. "stay low, and move quick. get inside once you're somewhere out of the cerfuffle. and stay there until the Batfeed says it's clear/containtained."
"Thanks.""We will." He watched them run off for a moment before re securing the door. When he got back to the bar he saw a girl on crutches and a man with a cane and someone clutching their bag to their chest.
"okay. it's about 20 steps total. 11 straight back, 9 to the right and then the door. do you guys have someone to pick you up or meet you? If not I have a friend who can meet you a block away and take you wherever you need to be." two had rides or lived close enough it didnt matter and one needed one. Danny pressed a button on his Fenton phone and said an address. "Come on." the group made it through the back and out the door.
Danny got back just as another bang rang out. The last guest he had before his bad day went to shit was there along with 5 more people. "There's only a few more after this. and I just got news. The bats are on their way. There was a jewlery store break-in which is why it's taking so long. there were hostages." Danny nodded and turned his attention back to the small group. reiterating his instructions and leading them out. Making sure to resecure the door behind him. It would be really stupid to get them out only to have someone else sneak up behind them.
He was going to kill his coworker(s) when he saw them next.
and demand a raise.
(He would do neither)(he would bitch about it to Sam and Tucker though)
He went back and led the rest of the guests through (one had the audacity to complain about not getting their drink).
He heard a crash just as he locked the door behind them. He sprinted back. The table had done its job alright. but it was now in pieces on the ground. The Other Guy was behind the counter with a knife in his hand. (Not one of the stores a part of Danny that used to be a hero noticed)
"You alright?"
"Ya. They all got out?"
"yup. That guy ok?"
"Probably not."
"Awesome. Danny, by the way."
"Tim."
The guy groaned and started to sit up.
"The bat birgade here yet?"
"Doesn't look like it."
"Great. Cool. Sweet. Awesome. Ok. Stay behind the counter and under 36in."
"What? no!"
"Just. Trust me."
"why should I‽"
"I did a thing."
"You did a thing?"
"I did a thing."
"and what praytell-" Tim's rant was cut off by the sound of gunshots getting closer and another person entering the store and the two starting to fight. (or continuing. Danny really didn't know where they were in in the fight) Danny slid back over to the espresso machine. "Tim. You see the coffee brewer?"
"Ya"
"when I say, push the red button and hit the floor."
"Why-"
"Just do it."
"ok ok."
"on my mark."
The two seemed to finally notice that they had company. And weren't happy about it. They started to head in Danny and Tim's direction.
"Danny-"
"Wait for it."
The gun slinging duo got closer. Shots rang out.
"Danny I really think-"
"Wait for it."
The sound of someone landing feet first on top of a man from a great height echoed into the cafe. (Danny was usually the cause of that sound, in his experience. it was weird hearing it from this side of things) he waited a moment. The sound of fisticuffs reached them.
"NOW" Danny hit the eapresso machine once, firmly just as Tim hit the button on the brewer. They both hit the ground at the same time. Nothing. and then, just as Tim was about to say something, both appliances exploded, spewing hot water/espresso beans at the thugs pointing guns at them. They screamed, clutching at their faces.
"You 'did a thing' did you?"
"What? I told you to trust me."
"Danny I-"
"Everything alright in here?" Batman asked, startling the two.
"Uh, ya. I think they'll need medical attention though. They seem to have burned themselves." Danny commented dryly as he nodded towards the two on the floor, clutching their faces.
Batman looked at them men writhering on the floor. Then at Tim. Then back at the men on the floor.
"Don't look at me B-Batman. He's the one that rigged his equipment to explode on command with like, 30 seconds notice."
"What." Danny said, looking up from where he was picking at his nails.
"The coffee maker."
"Excuse me. Jessica isn't a coffee maker. She's a miracal maker."
"That you exploded."
"Whose energies I temporarily redirected towards an alternative activity."
"With 30 seconds notice."
"I plan escape routes when I get bored. or annoyed."
"Marry me."
"what."
"what."

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Bruce being like that one teacher who hates/mistrusts you because they've taught your older sibling. Jon comes over to hang out with Damian all the time and that's OK but when they started dating, Bruce was on watch from the outset because he experienced Kon. It doesn't matter that Jon is Jon, there will be no funny business.
Bruce has so many crazy exes, he cant handle the idea that his children are the crazy exes
Dick: We have to be quiet.
Wally, slightly tipsy: Hear that, Roy? wE hAvE tO Be qUIeT.
Roy: Oh come on, Dick, you think the big bad Bat's going to yell at us for coming here late? It's not like you Bats ever sleep anyway.
Dick: No, not Bruce.
Wally: Alfred-
Dick: It's Duke.
Roy: Duke? The kid in the yellow? With the light show? You're afraid of him?
Dick, shhhing them: He's the day shift. He's sleeping. If you fucking wake him-
Duke, appearing at the top of the stairs: Hello Richard.
Dick:
Wally: Sorry to wake you, Duke.
Roy: We're just heading to bed now.
Duke: *walks away*
Wally: The great scary Nightwing afraid of a kid.
*at dawn*
Duke: *opens door to Dick's room where Wally is sleeping next to Dick and Roy is sleeping on the floor*
Duke: *flashbangs the fuck out of them*
Wally: *screaming*
Roy: *screaming*
Dick: *screaming*
Alfred: And is this your same-sex partner?
Tim: Alfred, this is Bernard. He's my roommate.
Alfred: Yes, that's what we called them back in the day.
Stephanie: What type of guys do you prefer?
Bernard: My boyfriend.
Stephanie, to Kon: And what type of guys do you prefer?
Kon: Bernard's boyfriend.
Bruce, concussed after a kidnap attempt: Who are you? You look familiar?
Green Arrow: I'm Green Arrow, Mr Wayne. Now, these guys are going to get you to the hospital. You just hang in there, OK?
Green Lantern: Before you go Mr Wayne, what can you tell us anything you know about-?
Bruce: Clark Kent and Superman are having an affair.
Hal:
Oliver:
Bruce: I walked in on them at last year's mayoral ball. I'm OK with it, Superman was just using me for my body but we can't tell Lois Lane. She's going to be so mad 😭.

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Batman: We are not calling this operation “Mission Impossible.” Nightwing: Fine. “Mission Possible But Annoying.” Red Hood: “2 Bat 2 Furious.” Batman: I’m revoking speaking privilege
I just thought of a way that Damian might try to convince Bruce to let him drive early. Damian : "See it's actually a good idea to let me drive early because if someone see's Robin driving the car then they'll assume Robin is at least 16. And because my age as Damian Wayne is public and is less then 16, it protects my identity as Robin."
Damian: No one will think I'm ten.
Bruce: We should test that hypothesis.
[later]
Damian: *driving*
Civilian: What's an eight-year-old doing driving a car?
Damian: >:(
Bruce: You're right. They don't think you're ten.