you MUST find whimsy in the mundane

a long distance friend is kind of a dead wife in a way

absolute cunt serves absolutely

no?

if hunter biden or rupaul tweeted this you'd be all over it

My sister just quoted this post at me over dinner bc it was discussed in her philosophy class & I can't even smugly inform her of its authorship. Due to the mindhunter yaoi state of my most recent blog history.

everytime u go outside ur spending $60 automatically its crazy $60 is the new $20

there are too many things happening this summer that i'm thinking we are going to need an extra 6-12 months of june and possibly another 3-4 months of july. probably no extra august as the problem should hopefully sort itself out by then. we are also looking into extending the day night cycle to 55 hours and extending the human lifespan to 10000 years.

I love talking about the biggest or best thing “this side of the Mississippi” because like hey buddy I can make the best peach cobbler in this half of the continent but god only knows what peach secrets they have over on the other coast. I’m not messing with that.

okay, im "sorry" i tested my dual scythe combos/fever mode on your "smol bean" boyfriend

The most basic, intractable fact about mental illnesses is that you simply cannot willpower your way out of them. The only exceptions to this rule are the ones I have, which continue to disable me due to lack of determination and other grave personal flaws

sometimes people go "isn't it hard having a rockin' set of cans and also an ass that won't quit?" and i have to go "yes. it is. thank you for seeing my struggle".

can we bring back the term "fair-weather friend" bc I feel like if fair-weather friends got called that more this whole argument about whether or not you should be there for your friends when it's inconvenient/at what point of personal inconvenience it's ok to bail on your friends would kinda fall apart bc like. we literally have a word for "friend who's only there when you don't need something from them" because the baseline expectation is that a friend should be there even when it sucks. like we used to make fun of people for bailing on their friends.