Chengqing princess bride AU, Jiang Cheng is Buttercup and Wen Qing is Westley, thank u for reading my post
(happy late birthday/early christmas)
The worst part about the kidnapping, in Jiang Cheng’s opinion, is having to spend (at this point) a full day listening to Wen Chao gloat. Having his core sealed is also deeply annoying, but mostly because no core = bad odds of escaping the gloating. Also, as incompetent as Wen Chao is, he did make it very clear that if Jiang Cheng attempted to escape again, his core would be reawoken and then crushed, “and then we’ll see if you can handle being thrown to the eels!!!”
The eels really weren’t that bad. It’s like Wen Chao doesn’t realize he can swim.
But anyway - the kidnapping, sealed core, and now being pursued by a rogue cultivator who may or may not be being pursued by the Jin rescue party means that he and Wen Chao are now high in the mountains, and Wen Chao is -
“Why the hell are you setting up a picnic,” Jiang Cheng snaps. Wen Chao sneers, and proceeds to blindfold and gag him before shoving him down to sit near the rock being used as a table.
“And now...we wait,” breathes Wen Chao, in what he clearly thought were tones of great menace.
Jiang Cheng feels a tic start up in his eyelid.
The sun really was very hot.
FINALLY, he hears the sounds of the rogue cultivator climbing up the hill towards them. There’s suddenly a knife at his throat, as Wen Chao leans forward and calls out, “So! It is down to you...and it is down to me.” Jiang Cheng is vaguely impressed by the sheer level of idiocy Wen Chao is showing, his bragging not slowing down at all in the face of someone who clearly fought their way past both Wang Lingjiao and Wen Zhuliu without breaking much of a sweat. Well. Wen Zhuliu at least would have been a challenge.
Jiang Cheng tries to place the rogue cultivator’s voice - it’s a woman’s voice, he’s fairly certain, but every time he thinks he’s on the cusp of recognizing her, it shifts. The challenge of figuring out who she is at least gives him something to focus on during the battle of wits. Wen Chao has eliminated both cups of wine so many times that Jiang Cheng has a sneaking suspicion his kidnapper has moved beyond bluffing and into being actually confused about which one has the poison. Finally, Wen Chao yells, “You've given everything away!”
“Then make your choice,” snaps the rogue cultivator.
“I will, I will,” whines Wen Chao. “I choose -” And Jiang Cheng feels him VERY obviously fake a startle and point to (presumably) something behind the rogue cultivator. “What in the world can that be?”
“What?” she says. Jiang Cheng feels Wen Chao lean forward and hears the fast clink of glasses being moved. Huh. So he did have an idea of where the poison was after all. Wen Chao leans back hastily. “I don't see anything,” says the rogue cultivator. Jiang Cheng tries to shout, to warn her, but just ends up having a coughing fit into his gag.
Wen Chao shrugs and smacks Jiang Cheng on the back hard enough to tip him over into the grass, which at least stops the coughing fit. “I could have sworn I saw something. Let's drink - me from my glass, and you from yours.”
Jiang Cheng groans. Well, getting rescued had been nice while it lasted. Maybe he’ll get to take the blindfold off after whoever was trying to un-kidnap him dies.
Wen Chao’s corpse falls on top of him.
The rogue cultivator swears quietly, shoves the body off of Jiang Cheng, and unties his blindfold and gag. Jiang Cheng squints against the sunlight and tries to see his - rescuer? Second kidnapper? - but all he can make out is a broad-brimmed hat, black veil, and robes with absolutely no sect-related imagery at all. Damn it.
“Who are you?”
She picks up Wen Chao’s knife and gestures for him to start walking. “I am no one to be trifled with, that is all you ever need know.”
Jiang Cheng stumbles forward. She’d kept his hands tied, and it turns out an unblocked core was pretty important for balance. “So - all that time it was your cup that was poisoned?”
The rogue cultivator shakes her head. “They were both poisoned. I spent the last few years building up an immunity to corpse powder.”
And with that, she pushes him forward, off the path and deep into the mountains. It takes far less time than Jiang Cheng would like for him to become completely exhausted. Less than forty minutes later, he’s collapsed back on the grass next to a ravine, panting for breath while the rogue cultivator scans the horizon behind them.
“If you'll release me,” he gasps, “whatever you ask for ransom - you'll get it, I promise you.”
She snorts, still looking behind them. “I’m not interested in a ransom. Besides, what is that worth, the promise of Jiang Wanyin? You're very funny, young master.”
“I was giving you a chance,” Jiang Cheng snaps. “But fine. Jin Guangyao has eyes everywhere. He can find you no matter where you take me.”
At the mention of his fiance, the rogue cultivator’s attention snaps to him. She takes a step forward and crouches in front of him, tracing the point of Wen Chao’s knife idly in the ground between them.
“You think your dearest love will save you?”
Jiang Cheng stares at her. “What kind of...We’re engaged, it’s an alliance, this hardly qualifies as anyone’s ‘dearest love’. But yes, he will save me. That I know.”
“You admit to me you do not love your fiance?” She’s digging at the ground with the knife now, chunks of dirt flicking onto both of their robes. He shrugs. “Or are you not capable of love, Jiang-gongzi, is that it?”
For the first time in the whole kidnapping process, Jiang Cheng wishes he could wake Zidian. As it is, without his core, he’s reduced to snarling, “I have loved more deeply than a monster like yourself could ever dream of-”
Wen Chao’s knife is at his throat.
“A warning, Jiang-Gongzi. In the Burial Mounds there are penalties when someone lies.” She sounds almost bored.
Oh. Oh no. This re-kidnapping is rapidly going downhill. Also, the eyelid tic is back with a vengeance.
“My apologies,” he says. “I did not realize I was in the presence of the feared Baoshan Sanren.”
Baoshan Sanren, the immortal Keeper of the Burial Mounds, bows. “What can I do for you?”
“You can die slowly, cut into a thousand pieces.”
She sighs. “Hardly complimentary, young master. Why loose your venom on me?”
Focusing on the eyelid tic is, as per usual, a surefire way to keep any emotion other than anger out of his voice. “You killed my love.”
“It's possible; I kill a lot of people.” She stands, tucks the knife away as she leans against a rock. “Who was this love of yours? Another Jin bastard like this one - ugly, rich, and scabby?”
“No. A doctor. Near the Burial Mounds, she and her family were attacked, and Baoshan Sanren never takes prisoners.”
She shrugs. “Well, I can't afford to make exceptions. Once word leaks out that an immortal has gone soft, people begin to disobey you, and then it's nothing but work, work, work, all the time.”
“You mock my pain!” Jiang Cheng staggers to his feet. Even with his hands tied, he should be able to do SOMETHING to get away, or to stop her from talking, or -
-aaaand the knife is back at his throat.
“Life is pain, Jiang-gongzi. Anyone who says differently is selling something.” She tilts her head, as if she’s looking past him into her thoughts. “I remember this doctor of yours, I think. She died well, that should please you. No bribe attempts or blubbering. She simply said, ‘Please. Please, I need to live.’ When I asked her what was so important to her, she spoke of a boy of surpassing beauty and faithfulness. I can only assume she meant you. You should bless me for destroying her before she found out what you really are.”
“And what am I?” he grits out. Her focus snaps back to him like a brand.
“Faithfulness, she talked of, young master. Your enduring faithfulness. Now, tell me truly. When you found out she was gone, did you get engaged to Jin Guangyao that same hour, or did you wait a whole week out of respect for the dead?”
He sees red. “You mocked me once, never do it again - I died that day!”
Jiang Cheng slams into Baoshan Sanren, knocking her off her feet and down the edge of the ravine. It’s an ugly fall - she’s clearly too surprised to stop herself - and he watches as her veil and hat are torn off by the rocks. And then, falling out of her hair - a wooden comb. Simple, carved with flowers.
“Oh, for FUCK’S SAKE,” he yells, and throws himself down the ravine at Wen Qing.
I love you so fucking much. This is insanely well done. EVERYBODY READ THIS!!!!!
