fick nicht die Welt sondern schwänger sie

breaking news: queen elizabeth, the mom from the royal family, is a nasty little thottie. and she just died from making it clap on instagram

happy that we're raising awareness but you can't make a post about this without mentioning that they collaborated for the sole reason of combining their last names like this

Big fan of all those other purple links and how “Associated prime” is untouched.

"op" isnt a bad term per se but it is a warning sign that ur post has left ur circle of mutuals. which is never good. like a canary in the coal mines

This is hilarious but I cannot stress enough never ever plug a strange USB into your computer Jesus Christ. You will get PC Chlamydia and die.

Professional computer guy here always stick weird flash drives into your computer it’s fun and sometimes you get to see Mikey’s meat

vampires have been drinking human blood for centuries they don’t give a fuck about guys on eight different antidepressants. they were sucking on asbestos factory workers

The absolutely hilarity of imagining some older vampires hectoring younger ones. “Back in my day, I had to drink blood with radium in it and I liked it! We glowed in the damn dark for weeks!”

cosmetic surgery is yassifed taxidermy for alive things

I may mention that every time I ordered in French. On my last day the owners gave me hugs and kindly told me to never speak in French again

They had your order ready so they wouldn’t have to hear you speak French 🤣

OH, MOTHERFUCKER

We have underestimated the comedic genius of the elderly when presented with technology

I wish all the pee came out in one go like a shotgun blast

you just dont get this on other websites

not to be a boomer but I hate this trend of recording every single emotional moment or act of charity and then putting it on the internet for clout. You can help the homeless without internet validation. You can give your grandma a meaningful gift without recording her at an emotionally charged moment. Not every aspect of your and other's personal lives must be posted on the internet.

I feel this way about people that set up a camera before helping an animal in need.

cmon child safety lid you know it's me