Esmé Squalor’s Wife

The most iconic passage in all of literature doesn't even consist of words, it's just that part in The Ersatz Elevator where Lemony Snicket couldn't come up with an accurate enough description of how dark it was when the Baudelaires fell down the elevator shaft, so he just filled up a couple of pages with a massive ink blot to prove his point and left it at that

That kraken leather jacket is amazing

'its not realistic for two characters to talk in the middle of a sword fight' cool I wrote it anyways because it fucks severely

Hey, have you ever fenced before? No? Then shut the fuck up, you wouldn’t know! Ask a fencer!

I'm gonna write six more mid-spar arguments to personallly piss you and only you off

I’m imagining this conversation happening while they fight with swords

wow okay unfollowing now, was a big fan of her hypnotizing skills and degree in optometry, was not aware she dated count olaf