a beetle

There were a lot of things that happened in Citadel public school which, in hindsight, Garrus was fairly certain could be classified as torture, but nothing, nothing, was worse than mixed-species sex ed classes.

The salarian teacher snatched an anatomically correct model of asari genitalia out of a human kid’s hands. “Never lick anything when you don’t know the provenance of the paint,” he snapped. He was new, frazzled, probably going to break in about… oh, Garrus gave it 12 months at the outside. Maybe fewer, given his lifespan.

One of the kids behind him – a regular on the bully circuit, a human called Luke – threw a stylus at Garrus’s head. He ignored it.

The salarian teacher sighed. “Now, how many of you have had sexual intercourse?”

Garrus didn’t raise his hand – for the very simple reason that he hadn’t – but all the other kids did, and the humans with particular gusto. One of them climbed onto the desk to raise his hand even higher. “Does anal count?” shouted another.

“You can’t fool me.” The teacher glared at them. “Given your age bracket, that is statistically unlikely.”

My Mind Is Still My Own

Ah, a long time coming piece of Saren Arterius. I do have a weak spot for antagonists that were the villains just because their point of view or means got skewed by something bigger and badder, and this broken turian is no exception.

Variegated Mantella (Mantella baroni), family Mantellidae, Ranomafana National Park, Madagascar

Poisonous.