Sleepy Multi-Color Cone

por qué no los dos tho

tänk juu for joor tsörman kontribjuusson, ai äpprishieit it veri mats. änd it oolsou helps mii tu gräsp tö essens of tsörman äksent

Samtajms aj vonder if ingliš spíking pípl ár ejbl tu rielajz det aj em ekšuely rajting in ingliš rajt náv bat džast vit veri slovak speling. Sou if jú spík ingliš bat not slovak ken jú plís riblog end lív en koment on tiz poust tenk jú veri mač

Самтаймз ай вондр иф иньглиш спикинь пийпль ар эйбль ту риэлайз дзят ай эм экшуалий райтинь ин иньглиш райт нау бат джаст виць вейрий рашин спеллинь. Со иф ю спик иньглиш бат нот рашин кэн ю плиз риблог энд лив э комент ан дзис пост цянк ю вейрий мач

Samtaims ai uonder if inglisc spiching pipol ar eibol tu rialais det i em acscualli raiting in inglisc rait nau bat dez uid veri italian spelling. sou if iu spic inglisc bat not italian chen iu plis riblog end liv a comment on dis post tenk iu veri macc’. 

sumtaimes ai wundère eef angliche peepole ar ébl tu rayolize zat i am actualie ritin en angliche rite nau bat dees iz veri french spélling. sau if u speec angliche bat nut french plis cun u reeblog end leev a commant en deez post tank u veri muche

I’m pretending it’s a Sailor Mars symbol

Had a dream that McDonald’s had a big ad campaign that just said “WE HAVE IT” in black cryptic writing. So I went to a drive thru and said “I saw the sign. Can I have it” and the speaker was silent for a solid ten seconds before saying “do you think you’re ready” in my voice and I screamed and drove away

i hate porn. “ohh fuck my ass!!!” you fuck your own damn ass

“Don’t you chihuahua my platypus!” and “Don’t you platypus my chihuahua!” are also excellent additions to the novel sentence files.

i did it… i came up with the ultimate millenials article

fuck….they checkmated us

i’m so mad but i can’t express my anger without proving them right

i never want context for this.

@1980sbusinesswoman

We like to think the internet within the past half decade or so has honed shitposting down to a science but racing horse names have us beat by decades

This is a case of necessity is the mother of invention- for both race horses and purebred show animals, every.single.animal. needs to have a unique name for record keeping purposes. Imagine trying to come up with a cool username if you aren’t allowed to add random numbers and underscores- only pronounceable words. Now imagine that this website has had tens of millions of users, and even after someone leaves the site their username can never be recycled. WELCOME TO PEDIGREE SHITPOST BINGO

Pedigree Shitpost Bingo would make a great horse name

Racehorse names are the original r9k

i dont get this.. is receiving a text really a bad scenario? what are you hoping for??? a call??

carlos it’s a bulbasaur they’re talking about pokemon go and how they’d rather encounter a pokemon then receive a text

What’s worse is when it’s a work text. Like bitch I’m hunting these critters for escapism, gtfo.