Moth Is Excited

In 2021, Swarovski (the company that makes the very sparkly crystals you see in certain jewelry, on figure-skaters' twinkliest outfits, on red carpet dresses), decided they didn't want the grubby fingers of small-time jewelers, clothing designers and costumers and crafters on their shiny beads and rhinestones anymore. They decided to limit their sales to "luxury" and couture creators, not girls who sell stuff on Etsy. The tenor of their press release on the subject was snide and insulting. Resellers (like your favorite bead shop) would no longer be allowed to carry their product; the average Jane on the street would not be able to purchase them. You could only get them if you had an authorized business agreement that bound you to very strict brand behavior. And those of us who still had good stock of the crystals would no longer be "permitted" to use the brand's name in our listings for sale.

Every bead shop and craft supply place and many, many small clothing makers--wedding shops, prom and dancing dress suppliers, the sort of salt of the Earth mom and pop time machines of shops that are the backbone of the field--scrambled to find something that could replace them. The last of the stock dwindled quickly, all of us grabbing what we could get while there was any chance of it, and then it was gone and we no longer had any access.

I was Big Pissed about it at the time. It was just so goddamn stuck-up, when wholesalers and indie jewelers had made them so much money, when some people I knew--when *I!*--had been brand-loyal for decades. But with no recourse, everyone pivoted fairly quickly, most of us to Preciosa Crystals. Those are Czech, quite sparkly, and considerably less expensive than Swarovski. The faceting method they use is different, but not worse; any differences are hardly noticeable when you're seeing them as a hundred pinpoints of light.

Well, out of nowhere, Swarovski just dropped this: https://www.harmanbeads.com/swarovski-brand-policy-update

"Effective June 1, 2026, Swarovski updated the distribution and brand usage policies introduced in 2021. Businesses may now purchase Swarovski Crystals without signing a Brand Control Agreement, and Authorized Distribution Partners may once again sell Swarovski Crystals to resellers, including bead stores and online retailers. Businesses may also use the Swarovski brand name when following Swarovski’s Proper Use Guidelines. Designers, manufacturers, artists, brands, retailers, and resellers are now eligible to purchase Swarovski Crystals through authorized distribution channels."

They want us back. A lot of the companies who could have kept a brand relationship with them also have swapped to Preciosa, over the last half-decade, in solidarity with indie creators and out of a sour awareness that it could be them, next. And it doesn't hurt that Preciosa was able to expand their line quite a bit now that everyone who wanted sparkle had no choice but to go to them.

And I'm not seeing nearly anyone who intends to return. The feeling is, "Y'all told us to fuck off! Off we fucked! And now, that's what you can do, too!" I'm seeing a lot of "How many of us did you stab in the back?" comments from the people whose money they're hoping to attract.

The implication of removing the space is that being trans isn't just one way a woman can be, like being tall or being brunette, but that women who are trans require a whole other noun.

Ok, there's a lot of well-meaning misinformation around from people who are just repeating what they've heard, so please, take it from someone with >25 years of experience of anal play of various kinds:

On cleanliness...

Not only do you not need to douche, but also, for most people most of the time, it's better if you don't. If you need to be absolutely clean as a whistle for a porn shoot or something, go for it. But otherwise, your gut is an amazing self-balancing system, that will take care of itself so long as you don't sabotage it by hosing it out. Douching can easily cause an upset gut that you'll then blame on the anal instead. So consider not doing that.

Unless you have a medical condition that precludes such, you have the ability to tell if you "need to go", based on sensations in the sphincter. If you don't have the feeling that you need to go, or at least reasonably could go, then you don't need to worry about anything; you can hop straight on that dick if you want to; it'll be fine.

If you follow the above advice, then 95% of the time it'll come out completely clean, 5% of the time there will be the tiniest amount of shit, an amount that can be cleaned in 2 seconds with a wet wipe or similar. And, you were going to clean it at least that much afterwards anyway, right?

Some further general tips:

Do: enjoy a good amount of fibre generally in your diet on a daily basis if you want things to come out clean.

Don't: make sudden drastic changes to your diet or take laxatives/anti-diarrhoea meds to try to vacate it or placate it. Once again, your gut is an amazing self-balancing system if you will kindly just let it do its thing.

Finally, some things I've generally assumed:

I assume you know about basic safe sex and can make your own decisions in that regard re what's an acceptable risk to you. I'm not going to tell you always use condoms or never do such-and-such because you know what, I'm not the boss of you. Use them or not, do things or not, it's your call.

You are welcome! And, it depends on what you mean by "permanently loosening".

A lot of people think (and talk) about the anal sphincter like it's an elastic band that can lose its tension over time if stretched too much, and it's not. Like any muscle, the sphincter muscles can atrophy (in which case it would lose its tension), but atrophy comes from disuse, not from stretching.

The sphincter muscles are muscles, and can be stretched like other muscles, and retain their stretchiness (or not) dependent on whether it's maintained by frequent stretching.

The muscle tone, on the other hand (that which keeps them* closed when not needing to be open) is—just like any other muscle—maintained by regular use.

*Plural because we have an internal and external sphincter; the former is involuntary, and it automatically releases when when your body decides it's time to go; the external sphincter then remains closed until such a time as you're ready to go and consciously release it.