Rage with animal clarity

I love gay people theres a guy in my neighborhood who named his one singular dog “simon and garfunkel”

has anyone noticed that after the porn ban of 2018 tumblr was essentially killed from the mainstream and everyone flocked to other social media sites like twitter and meta. then those sites got enshittified to where twitter became Nazi Central and meta sites had an entire meme around getting “zucced” aka mark zuckerberg himself would ban you for saying a no-no word like fuck. and then the mainstream shifted to tiktok where infamous toddlerspeak sentences like “he got unalived by a pew pew” were born because if you once again say a no-no word like kill or gun or any other word that isn’t corporate i mean kid friendly then the algorithm will bury your post into the ground. and somehow we’ve come full circle and tumblr is now the most bearable social media site because although we can’t have female presenting nipples we can at least talk to each other like adults. has anyone noticed that at all or is it just me and the flaming skull

Forbidden nesquik 

why in God’s name was it necessary for so many people to clarify that a dirty bag of blood from the gardening section isn’t safe to eat like what fucked up tumblr subculture has my shitpost reached

probably the horny vampires

They found the last golden ticket . So that’s just it then . Fuck my stupid horrible pathetic life. Cabbage soup for dinner again , my stupid mothtsr. Grandpa Joe said he’s sorry but I know he doesn’t really give a fuck . And who gives a fuck about the other three old people in my house . Whatever their names is. Fuck fuck fuck it’s all worthless . They even made fun of me at school for only buying like 3 wonka bars. Nepo pricks . Fuck my stupid life it’s all fucked it’s all fucked . And my last name is bucket

the strongest bond is probably pad wings to themselves. the weakest is probably pad wings to your underwear

the guy who makes the adhesive for pads should really swap jobs with the guy who makes the adhesive for pads

i love learning about animals ive literally never seen or heard of before. what amazing diversity of life on this planet earth. what the hell is a japanese serow

aliens love travelng million of light years to be naked in the middle of the night in a forest

Now, your resume says you spent seven years as a “sex wizard”

I like the nodding emoji 🙂‍↕️ for how at peace it is. when I use it I feel like a wise sage who has reached an enlightened truth of the universe. mmmm 🙂‍↕️ monkey

The best reddit thread I’ve ever seen was when someone asked if the gang from Always Sunny in Philadelphia could kill Darth Maul and almost all of the responses were over 4 paragraphs long

Best quote from that thread: “To give the gang a slight advantage, We’ll assume that Darth Maul has not seen any of the films in the Home Alone franchise.”

isn't it kind of crazy that for any moving vehicle you need to wear a seatbelt but then on buses they're just like fuck it stand up whatever