Haze Of Fandom

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“Shane Hollander?” Shane blinks dumbly at them. “Yes. Um, hi. Hello.” Hayes shares a quick bemused glance with his wife. “I’m Wyatt. I play with Roz,” he says, holding his hand out to shake. “And this is my wife, Lisa.” He nods to her, and she smiles sweetly. “I, uh, I know who you are,” Shane says, accepting the handshake. “Ah. Sweet.”

@himbotheninth 3,296 | Gen | no archive warnings apply

6,980 | T+ | no archvie warnings apply

And they are sitting around Shane Hollander's fucking fire pit, and Ilyusha has his head on his husband's shoulder, which is nice to witness and cute enough that Sveta snaps a picture of them. She wasn't allowed to have these sorts of pictures on her phone for a very long time and she likes seeing her friend this way. She likes it just as much as the blurry images she recieves from Sasha living his best life in Paris, pinned between beautiful people of every gender. She likes it just as much as the pictures her mother sends her whenever she's in Detroit and sends Sveta pictures of her aunts and cousins and dogs all made up in hats.

She hasn't hardly swallowed the last of the wine in her glass when Shane leans over and tips the bottle towards her. She's been waited on hand and foot since arriving here--a natural consequence of one of the homeowners being her childhood best friend and the other being that friend's husband, who is still mildly afraid of her.

Shane discovers that the bottle is empty when only a trickle exits into Svetlana's glass. He tilts it up and says, "Oh, we have another."

Ilya rises from the couch with the energy of a ressurected corpse. "I'll get it," he says, waving at both of them to stay sitting. "No, don't get up, I'll--sit down, Hollander."

Sveta elected, long ago, to ignore the way that Shane lets Ilya boss him around. She can read between the lines and that's none of her business--at least not until she can put Ilyusha between herself and Sasha and interrogate him about it, preferably somewhere within earshot of Shane Hollander and his easy blushes.

Shane still looks a little dazed when he says, "It must be weird for you. To see him like this."

"I have seen Ilyusha drunk many times."

"No, I mean, like...here?"

"In Canada? I can't really say I saw it coming, no."

"No, like..." Shane sighs, shifts in his seat. "I dunno. Settled, I guess? Married. It must be weird to you that he, like, got married."

Sveta opens her mouth and barks out a single, harsh laugh that scares a bird on the lake into flight.

Shane jumps in his seat and says, "Okay, I get that it's funny, but--"

"Shane Hollander," Sveta says, leaning over the arm of the admittedly very comfortable patio chair she's sprawled over. "You think I'm surprised that Ilya got married? Ilya Rozanov?"

Let it never be said that Shane Hollander doesn't rise to a challenge (Nobody has ever said this; he is the most competitive person on the continent) because he levels his eyes at her and says, "Yes."

Sveta barks another laugh at the sky. So many fucking stars out here.

"Let me tell you a story." She turns herself to face Shane, empty wine glass cradled to her chest, bundled into her (very nice, purposefully and fashionably frumpy) sweater. "There was this roaving band of girls in our neighborhood. Fucking feral. And we would meet up on this playground. Ilyusha would be there with his mother and I would be there with my nanny and the girls--I don't know. Anyway, he was the only boy. The things they made him do, Shane. Their favorite game was to make him lay on his back like a baby while they pretended to feed and rock him. They fed him grass."

"...Okay."

"And one day he gets tired of being the baby and says, if we're going to play house, I should be the husband. And the girls say, okay Ilyusha. You can be all of our husband."

Shane huffs out a laugh, and visibly considers the repercussions of being jealous of a band of young Russian children from the previous century, and then laughs again.

"I think I was worried, maybe, you know. Because even at that age, I had some idea how some Russian men thought of being a husband." Svetlana lets the thought percolate for a moment, souring the story just slightly. "But Ilya just starts saying, Hello my beautiful wives. I'm back from work at the factory. How nice to come home to my beautiful wives. On and on. Oh how I love my beautiful wives! I will use my factory money to buy you all beautiful coats!"

"He did not," Shane says, but he's got most of his fist in his mouth at this point, just fucking gnawing as he pretends not to be charmed. Or maybe is just very, very charmed.

"And for years after, he would call those girls his wives. He remembered their birthdays every year. He cosigned on an apartment for one of them while she was unemployed. Another, I think he still pays for her mother's medical treatments."

Shane smiles a melancholy, sweet smile at the fire. "He's...a good guy. A great guy."

"The best," Sveta says.

"Yeah. But that's...that's just how he is." Shane shrugs. "But, you know, none of that really has anything to do with--"

"Let me tell you another story," Sveta says, interrupting the spiral. "I love my father, yes? He always treated me well. My mother never had anything bad to say about him, he never said anything bad about her. I'm a very lucky girl, to have a good papa like him."

"Sure," Shane says, easily, because he was also a child whose father kissed and hugged him.

"But his best friend was Grigory Rozanov. Who was...not so."

"I've heard."

"I wasn't around Grigory all the time. Or even a lot. But whenever I was, and I heard the way he spoke to his women--Irina, later Polina--Ilya would get this look on his face. Mad, yes, but also embarrassed. He would look at me like he wished I wasn't there to see it. And every time he would say, I'm sorry about that."

Shane glances over his shoulder, probably anticipating Ilya's return. Sveta somehow gets the feeling that he'll return exactly once she's said what needs saying.

"The first time he came back to Moscow after moving to the US, he said to me..." Sveta purses her lips, because this makes her emotional, and she doesn't very much like being emotional. "He said that the world was far too cruel to walk through it alone. And that he didn't know why people were so cruel to the person they had chosen to walk through it with." She tilts her head, meets Shane Hollander's eyes. "He said...I have always told myself I will have the strength not to be cruel."

Shane's eyes are catching the firelight in a new, specific way.

"And as you know," Sveta says, tone lighter. "Ilya Rozanov is one of the strongest people on this fucking planet."

"Would you excuse me?" Shane mumbles, scrambling out of his seat.

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The CCM photoshoot. After Shane gets added, CCM inform Ilya that he cannot eat peanuts for at least 24 hours prior to the shoot (since they'll be in each other's faces and they don't want to risk killing the #2 overall pick).

Maybe the stylists gossip or smth, but it all amounts to Ilya knowing about the allergy from the jump and being one of the very few who don't treat him like he's fragile or deserves pity.

oh MAN okay okay: so i feel like they wouldn't be telling someone else's medical information, BUT i 100% feel like yuna puts things like an allergy-free set in shane's rider from the very start, and yeah she has to bring down the hammer sometimes especially when shane is new in his career so people are a little eyeroll about new kid on the scene being picky (it's one of the reasons she's ALWAYS on these sets with shane), but it's just a default of, "hey, craft services cannot have X, X, or X, and approved styling products are X, X, and X. all substitutions must be cleared by his management at least 48 hours in advance."

so ilya gets told as part of this shoot, "hey, we don't allow blah, blah, blah on set for allergy reasons" without saying there's actively a person who is being considered here. and ilya is new! he doesn't really know how all of this works yet no matter how confident he has to act about it, so as far as he knows, this is just how ad sets work. i also cannot remember of it was an ask or a question i got, but i THINK someone also told me that stuff like peanut allergy warnings are not super common in russia but relatively VERY more present in north america, so i also 100% buy ilya being like, "cultural thing, maybe? normal for over here?"

and he and shane are making smalltalk at the side of the rink, and ilya brings up that he organized the shoot, and he's still looking for more stuff to say to keep them talking (because tbh? just a lil nervous about talking to his crush especially after admitting he arranged this and still not sure if shane is vibing back or not and also still working on getting fully comfortable with english), so he brings up, "crazy we cannot even have peanut butter here, yes?" because again: DOESN'T KNOW THIS IS A SPECIFIC REQUEST. STILL THINKING THIS IS PROBABLY JUST A LIABILITY THING FOR AD SETS IN GENERAL OR SOMETHING.

and shane immediately is wondering if he's being made fun of or something?? did someone tell??? is rozanov being shitty about this?? is this a dig? but no. he said "we". he's not assuming it's shane's fault (wouldn't be his fault anyway, but it's how shane thinks about it). and he doesn't know rozanov yet, so he's not going to bust out his medical history when he doesn't have to, especially if he thinks rozanov MIGHT be shitty about it if he's going to bring up the set rules. so he just "yeah, they're pretty strict about it." so now ilya is just internally like 'yeah, so okay. this is how things go. his mom is his manager so she probably knows all the rules and told him. noted.' which tbh? kind of a relief. now he knows something important for this career (ooooh ilya).

so they agree to meet up, but ilya has now been thinking about the forbidden allergies purely the way you will when someone brings something up to you and tells you not to eat it (not even spitefully against the rules, just "man, someone mentioned peanut butter and said not to eat it, and now i REALLY want some peanut butter"), so he does something like get thai food with peanut sauce for dinner, and then obvi he has a mint right before meeting up with shane, but he's trying to act SO cool guy and going through the whole bother of brushing his teeth and using mouthwash would feel like Doing Too Much (jesus christ, teenaged boy with a crush). so his breath doesn't SMELL like peanuts, but he hasn't scrubbed any potential traces clear.

and the hookup with them happens pretty quick from first kiss to finishing, so shane at the end is catching his breath...and catching his breath...a-and catching...his breath. and then realizes that his throat and chest going so tight is a reaction and not just being fresh out of orgasm (and really FUCK his life. he gets the first sexual experience he has ever wanted and now THIS? FUCK his fucking EVERYTHING).

and ilya hasn't seen someone have a reaction before, so he doesn't actually know what's happening at first. is this? a freakout? "hollander, are you ok-" but then shane is scrambling up and tearing through his bag and ilya is just ?? what??? is goign on right now?? and then shane finds his epipen and doesn't want to sit on hotel floor because Gross but manages to wobble back to the bed and use it, and ilya STILL doesn't know?? what the fuck is happening?? but hollander couldn't really breathe right and now he stabbed?? himself?? with something?? and ilya can read context clues enough to understand that this is a medical thing, which is alarming, but also shane in the aftermath of using the epipen is shaking violently because that's just a side effect of it, and he's still catching his breath, but ilya bunches up the comforter to put around him because he thinks maybe he's just shivering??

and shane manages to get his breath back enough to say, "hey, ca-can you ca-call an ambulance?" and ilya is ?! yes but ?! and then shane realizes he's still naked so need to fix THAT first (fuck his FUCKING life), so he starts to get up and ilya (who is tbh a little freaked out right now because still doesn't know what's happening but shane looks Not Okay) just gently pushes him back down and grabs his (ever so helpfully neatly folded) clothes for him and puts them beside him on the bed and also puts his own clothes back on SO fast because obviously that needs to happen Now, and when he gets done, shane still hasn't gotten his shoes on or something because shaking still and also still has fucky blood pressure so getting a head rush leaning over, so ilya ends up helping.

and then ilya calls for him and also just. doesn't feel okay leaving him. their rivalry hasn't set in yet and this is the first time they've done anything so what even is there to hide (nothing obvious is on the bed, and beside a crumpled tissue in the bin, there's no other evidence), and also people already saw them talking during the shoot today so not beyond the realm of possibility that they'd just be doing more of that since they're already in the same hotel. and yuna was leaving the hotel earlier to get a drink with a friend or something who happens to be in town, so shane doesn't want to ruin that for her over a stupid reaction (and also wants to feel like an adult and not have to have his mom come running when she already stayed with him all day because of his allergies when he KNOWS it's noteworthy for someone's mom to be doing this), so when the paramedics ask about if anyone needs to be contacted or if anyone's coming along, he very honestly is like, "no, my mom's busy."

and ilya fully on impulse tells shane, "i can come. if you want." because like. he's already here. he still doesn't FULLY understand what happened here. but shane looks really sick rn and he knows from meeting her in the elevator that yuna was leaving the hotel, and he doesn't know why shane wouldn't just call (maybe she doesn't take her phone when she goes out?), but HE wouldn't want to take an ambulance ride by himself if he felt as bad as hollander looks right now (he almost certainly would end up doing it because who else would there be to come with him, but he wouldn't WANT to). and shane is a little thrown, but yeah, he doesn't know him well but it's not like he has a secret to keep from him at this point and maybe not a bad idea to have someone who can call his mom on his phone if he needs them to because of a secondary response or something.

so ilya ends up going to the hospital with him, and they end up talking because what else is there to do in this four hour observation window. and shane confesses to his allergies and being the reason the set couldn't have allergens on it. and ilya can read people. he can see that shane is bracing himself here. but ilya doesn't actually care. he'll chirp hollander and have fun with him, but he's not actually going to make fun of someone's medical condition, especially when they've ended up in the hospital because of it.

(and because. of him then eating something. that triggered that medical condition. oops.)

and they actually end up getting along during this time they've got 1:1, and of COURSE yuna finds out shane's not in his room because she went by to say goodnight and also hand over a new sponsorship deal someone sent over while she was out and got printed in the business center at the hotel to let shane look at it (prefers papers he can touch instead of reading on a phone), but shane?? didn't answer?? honey, you feeling okay?

and now yuna does end up at the hospital and is surprised at finding rozanov there, but as shane is scrambling, rozanov hops in with an excuse of saying he went up to see if shane wanted to work out together (a wink wink that only shane will understand lmao), but then shane started having a reaction. so now what yuna knows about ilya rozanov is that he was actively trying to hang out with her son and be friendly AND he then helped her child during an allergic reaction and even went with him to the hospital after.

and through the power of yuna, ilya and shane end up exchanging numbers because yuna won't say it but she's always excited when shane ends up making a new friend, so she drops a, "why don't you boys trade numbers? then you can hang out the next time you're in the same place for something."

so now they've started texting WAY earlier than in canon, and to shane's mom at least it's understood they're not really enemies right from the start (with the context of ilya is actually nice to shane in person, she understands that the rivalry is just an nhl narrative, and she understands marketing and spin), so she encourages shane in texting him, and even when they're in the same place (like at all stars), she encourages them meeting up and getting dinner together.

and for shane's part, ilya teases him about it later, but it's not mean or exclusionary. they plan on getting dinner with shane's parents for the first time or something and rozanov hits him with a, "i should order peanuts again and try to kill you, do you think? or is twice just bad manners?" and it's such a relief to have someone who thinks it's something that can just be joked about. rozanov doesn't treat him differently now except for asking shane now and then about stuff just because he's not wanting to kill shane the next time they meet up lol.

and they've seen things like them at the edge of an event being dumb teenagers but in a way that's really sweet with ilya trying something and going, "mmm no, they are liars, i think. tastes like poison for hollanders." so they also?? just assume?? that ilya's family also knows they're friends?? and yuna atp has answered questions for ilya before on contracts or brand deals because he doesn't always get translations of things but won't ask because doesn't want to get condescended to, so at a certain point she noticed him frowning at something and looking back and forth between a dictionary on his phone and the paper he was looking at and just pulled a "need some help?" and ilya resisted at first because Pride...but also yes, please.

but then they go up to ilya and his father at this event??? and the vibes are Off??? they know ilya by now so they know he's funny and sociable?? but he is now SILENT?? and glances at his father before he speaks? and uuuuuh that sure is some clues to follow.

and on TOTAL impulse one day, david at dinner or something just so casually observes that the flight back and forth to russia for holidays must be hard. and ilya (who was making fun of shane for not wearing his glasses but also helping him look at the tiny ass allergy warnings on this menu) looks up and SO neutrally goes, "yes, is very long. i don't usually go back. just for summer." because zero chance he's getting into the guilt of feeling relief at having an excuse he knows he shouldn't be using.

but then david AGAIN SO CASUAL is just, "well, if you want a shorter plane ride, you're always welcome to come stay with us."

and I'm fucking WEEPING imagining the end of the night when everyone is starting to pack up and go home and he hears david say, "okay, wait, where are mine?" because everyone's in a shuffle collecting jackets and leftovers and kids, and then yuna comes up behind ilya and puts a hand on his shoulder in a "gotcha, stay put" mom gesture and calls back, "I've got one of them. where did shane go?"

B R U H

(read more because JESUS this post is getting long)

4,257 | T+ | no archive warnings apply Part 2 of Series: The Bryce Fury Fumble

first week of comic book school and i accidentally turned in one of my school library books to the united states postal service

immediately pANICKED

receipt: