Maybe ill never die becuse am special

your mom jokes don't work when you know someone too well. I would never be in bed with such a wicked woman. That's not even what I had your mom saying last night. I wouldn't speak to her.

i looked up the source for this and its from an anime where a dude has to keep a constant boner for a month straight or he loses his house

is this the episode where he lost his house

I have not stopped thinking about this even once for the last 8 years

princess peach at the sperm bank

nothing could have prepared me for that comment

mario at the sperm bank

worry about it kitten daddy fucked up

don't worry kitten daddy got it

start worrying kitten daddy fucked up

The princess I kidnapped and keep locked in my tower recently got on tumblr and has since been complaining that I don't respect her 'hmphs' enough. I'm not sure she understands our relationship.

The new maid who took me to this nice summer home doesn't seem to be listening to me? Even though I'm literally going "hmph!"

so. i just learned that my entirely me-written resume flags as being AI-written by automated HR systems for a few writing quirks and the fact that i followed all the rules of good resume writing, which is apparently a telltale sign of AI use in this fucking hellworld. i've been desperately applying to jobs that i am massively overqualified for for months with no response, not even an interview, and now i find out that at least part of the reason is because some fucking moron decided that following the rules every career advisor has given me for a decade means i cheated and should be disqualified. the ai bubble cannot pop soon enough. what the actual fuck.

"frequent use of action-result sentences. bullet points all start with action verbs. no career gaps." girl what the fuck are you talking about. that's just resume writing advice being followed. i just did what i was told. it's a fucking resume. you're supposed to do all that stuff. what the fuck do you mean it looks ai generated and wouldn't pass basic detection systems?????????? for following the resume writing rules????????????

wishing every AI bro and ceo a very [REDACTED]