monstersanonymous

Fuck I’m at a fencing tournament and literally a minute after I reblogged this my dad told me that he talked to the point people and I’m probably going to win a medal.

BURN BAGEL BURN

OH WHY NOT?

I GOT A JOB THE DAY AFTER MY QUEUE POSTED THIS THE FIRST TIME AND I JUST REALIZED IT WHEN I SAW IT AGAIN HOLY GOD

The bagel hasn’t let me down yet!

Let’s see what you can do bagel

I need your luck, bagel

….. Bagel?

Bagel.

Roasted bagel

Bagel I need you

Nothing to lose here

Could use some good news 🤞

“why is movie grace so scared of rocky’s ship” cuz they asked ryan gosling how he would react in that situation and he was like “dude id be so scared”

Another reason why trains would be good is that most people are not good at driving

What if silence is in fact a sound, but because its a universal sound we just adapted to it and dont notice it anymore

HAPPY PRIDE MONTH! 🏳️‍🌈

Idk what person with chronic illness needs to hear this, but you can do things to make your responsibilities nicer for yourself. You can get an ice cream after a blood draw. You can sit down for tv time after an injection. You can pick out the bandaids that have cartoon characters on them instead of the plain ones. Being an adult doesn’t stop you from benefiting from encouragement. Go for whatever fits with your routine/abilities/budget and makes life a little better. A spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down etc etc

tampon creature

at my local thrift warehouse where nothing’s priced and you make an offer on all the stuff you find. well i told the person at the register i’m on a budget and didn’t know if i could afford a rug i wanted and asked what they’d take for it and without missing even half a beat they said “how about a cup of blood?” then they started hopping up and down like a cheerleader and said “cup! of! blood!”

we settled on seventeen dollars cash.

food doesn’t actually “go bad”, it just gets eaten by something else first

who’s gonna tell tumblr that executive dysfunction is more than Not Doing Things?

Girl, help. None of my executives are functioning

So many anti-science (and particularly, anti-vax) people apply their diet and orthorexia culture to medicine. That is one of the things you will hear over and over again. “I actually read the ingredients of this vaccine and it has [SUBSTANCE] in it so I will not let my child get vaccinated.” which is exactly how these people grocery shop, I’m sure. No understanding of chemistry, no research into why that ingredient is in there, what it is doing to help make the vaccine safe and effective and what amount would make it toxic to the human body. They will be like “Oh my god, there is hydrochloric acid in there! I’m not going to research into why it is in there (in small amounts as a PH stabilizer), it’s hydrochloric acid (the human body creates it naturally) and they’re trying to inject this into our children!”

This is the closest thing to a smile I've ever seen this man do for media