modern day folk curses

therefore, I imagine that eating a diseased human artery would be a similar experience, texture-wise, to slurping one of THESE babies

Source

Gives my enemies conviction

But I'll make them see red

This first thing I thought when I woke up from surgery was I am so hungry and I need ramen right now! but the second thing I thought was Oh my god, I’m safe.

I was safe.

I thought about having kids someday, but the thought was always divorced from the concept of having to grow them in my body. Whenever I thought about it, I would either start screaming or my mind would shut down. My worst nightmares featured discovering I was pregnant, and realizing I would have to keep it, and go through childbirth. I was terrified.

I got the surgery, and realized I was safe, and I never had those nightmares ever again. It was like finding out I was bulletproof.

Later, I looked at the broken condom, and I didn’t see my life flash before my eyes. I didn’t see my hopes and dreams turn to ash as I pivoted all my energy into a child I didn’t want. I didn’t see a possibility of starvation or homelessness because my already modest income went to a child I couldn’t afford. I didn’t see my disabled body becoming further disabled, or killed, by a pregnancy that I didn’t want.

This first thing I thought when I woke up from surgery was I am so hungry and I need ramen right now! but the second thing I thought was Oh my god, I’m safe.

I was safe.

I thought about having kids someday, but the thought was always divorced from the concept of having to grow them in my body. Whenever I thought about it, I would either start screaming or my mind would shut down. My worst nightmares featured discovering I was pregnant, and realizing I would have to keep it, and go through childbirth. I was terrified.

I got the surgery, and realized I was safe, and I never had those nightmares ever again. It was like finding out I was bulletproof.

Later, I looked at the broken condom, and I didn’t see my life flash before my eyes. I didn’t see my hopes and dreams turn to ash as I pivoted all my energy into a child I didn’t want. I didn’t see a possibility of starvation or homelessness because my already modest income went to a child I couldn’t afford. I didn’t see my disabled body becoming further disabled, or killed, by a pregnancy that I didn’t want.

Me: a lot

Vampire: Ugh I can't get the taste out of my mouth. You TASTE LIKE INFLAMMTION! How?? Do you taste?? Like inflammation??? How are you alive?! Do you want me to turn you so you never fall sick again?

Me: yes actually let's do that

NYEEEHEHEHEHEHE

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