Experience the joy of exploding!

wedding dresses are white specifically so that if the bride goes axe-crazy you can rest assured you will see the blood stains all over her and it'll be sick as fuck

the best thing about being alive on earth is that sometimes there is a kitty

i just got shot with a puppy rifle but it didnt hurt me because im not a puppy

me i just got shot by an elephant gun but im not even an elephant so im ok

i just got shot with a 9mm handgun but i'm ok because i am taller than 9mm

hi! I'm a 9mm tall puppyphant and i'm excited to be here!

Holds you gently in my hands.

i dont wanna work i wanna get felt up by 6-12 disembodied hands (female)

if you are pure of heart and strong of spirit, grocery shopping takes just half an hour and only hurts a little bit

they need to make it possible for me to give a big warm hug to every shy trans girl simultaneously.

bring out the rotating tiger

so youre telling me that some asshole can just throw together meaningless shit and get notes and attention yet when i put actual thought into the things i say nothing happens i am so fucking done with this bullshit god damn fuck

id lie right to willy wonkas face. “did you drink fizzy lifting drinks” of course not. And then id hit him

This is why you won't inherit the factory.

i dont want the factory. I want to see fear in his eyes

if i was a little kitty and you were a little kitty would you touch noses with me to say hi