only my best skywarp! only my best (best)!

I don't! Dratchet does happen in this au but it's also loosey-goosey war is over and lots of bots and cons are hooking up because it's a silly au set within this fic made by a friend (it's a fun read!) but instead of dratchet baby- we got megaratch accident baby because their partners (plural) went off on vacation at the same time and left these two grouchy old men alone and neither of them thought they could spark-

- sneezed wrong

- turned your neck a little too fast

- slept weird

- took the trash out to the curb and stepped at a slightly different angle than usual

- breathed

- failed to breathe properly

- breathed in the wrong stuff. Allergy time

- looked too hard at something too far away

Day 17: Nautica and Road Rage

I need the Autobots or Decepticons to track down someone, who went into stasis on earth for the war, only to find fungi mycorrhiza clogging their Energon lines having consumed every drop. I need lichens, mosses, and ferns sprouting from their frame, slowly absorbing the micronutrients that leech off of them as bacteria and protists excrete acid to dissolve them microscopically. I need small detritivores like snails, isopods, and insects eating those plants and bacteria. I need a nest of mice hidden under their armour. I need a clutch of mysterious eggs safely nestled away in a burrow under their arm. I need the earth to completely and entirely reclaim them.

And the worst part, the worst part is that I need them to see that this was inevitable. I need them to see that they can clean them up, remove all the plants and debris, provide them with fresh Energon, and see how their very processor has been rusted and corroded

Everything but their spark is dead and consumed, and even that is barely holding on by a thread. They’re functionally a living corpse. At what point do you just let the wildlife take the rest of them? At what point do you wonder if their spark will even return to the allspark?

I need them to see that this will happen in every habitat across earth. Maybe not as fast. A rainforest is hungrier than a desert: but they’ll both eat you.

I need them to see that: even with Unicron locked away, asleep for millennia more, he will still consume them if they stay.

Everytime they see an organic from here on out, I need them to shiver

[Fungal metal corrosion| Radiotrophic fungi| Plants that absorb heavy metals ]