a watched nut never busts. or something. i dont fucking know what you people find funny anymore. 9/11.

why is this the one

i cant stop saying "grisp it"

Kindergarteners will be so proud of themselves for being able to draw a triangle. My GPU can draw tens of thousands of those in a second. You are not special.

You can run Doom on 12000 kindergarteners wired together

what's wrong babe you're barely anything

*stuffs my pussy with oatmeal* breakfast is ready

*hogs squealing*

maybe this is why they’re deleting tumblr

Oh fuuuuck. Oh fuck dude. I just got bit by a fucking clam and tonight's the full moon

New Taylor swift song called fuck like a mountain rat

Dude why are my pockets so wet (figures out im currently peeing myself) Ohhhhhhhh

It was me I shoved my dick in your pocket and pissed I'm sorry

one time my friend and i came up with a basic “language” called wheat vegetable root. wheat represented every noun. vegetable represented every verb. root represented every adjective. it was very body language based. if my friend beckoned and said “vegetable”, i understood that my friend was telling me to walk with them. if my friend pointed to something and said “wheat”, i understood that they were showing me something. if they said “root wheat” and smiled, they’re saying this thing is good. if they say “root wheat” and frown, they’re saying this thing is bad. we spent a whole day talking like this and drove the rest of our friends insane.