(mettaton voice) Oh, Banana

[cazador voice] now we can only complete my kickass immortality ritual if astarion makes it to the ritual site. so don't forget to lock the ritual site behind a door that's coded in a language he doesn't speak whose dictionary is currently being held by the cursed corpse of a child he doesn't know. and also my signet ring. and don't tell him any of this. really the joys of the ritual are secondary to standing here on this platform with all of you for three weeks, waiting, while astarion sort of fucks around in my house trying to figure out how to get here

I want to write. I have ideas. I open document. I type four of the worst sentences ever created in the english language. I daydream the rest of the scene. I close document.

TBH Nearly Every Post By @willgrahamscock Belongs On My Blog

​I’m cock ur penis… can I make it anymore obvious

wild to me that lord of the rings is from the 1950s. people were really eating jellied salmon and sausages from a can while first reading this shit. middle earth was being described to the smooth dulcet tones of 1950s crooners on a big console radio. feels wrong somehow

people were laying asbestos linoleum over hardwood floors. and then contentedly curling up on their quilted Perma-Prest duvet to read up on what the counsel of elrond was up to.

I know this has good intentions, so I will just add the "how you treat them, even as objects of fiction, can speak about your own character, be careful out there"

Truly animals are some of the most numerous creatures of earth

Count em

1

Nothing wrong with me