MGirlyS

Halfway doing this I asked myself ❝  what’s the point? ❞

Here's the TRUE original:

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~ Applications for the MGSEVENTS Valentine's Day Exchange are open! ~

Applications will be open until January 14th! Schedule and FAQ can be found below the cut as well as on the application form.

Apply here!

what the person likely actually means:

“I’m tired of badly shoehorned references to the current POTUS or the 2016 US Presidential Election that will age like milk”

“I don’t like to see idiotic swipes or jokes at the expense of Richard Spencer or someone like that, because nobody fucking understands what the hell you’re talking about unless you’re a no lifer that lives online like me and I feel the lesser for it”

“Do you really need to put in a “So much for the tolerant ______” joke in your game?”

“Your attempt at exploring politics through the writing for your game would be embarrassing for a 16 year old to write and you’re fucking in your 30s holy fucking shit”

“I see what you tried to do here but you categorically failed entirely and only made a half baked surface level take”

“Nice joke, did John Oliver write it for you?”

“why did you say “triggered” or put an attack helicopter joke in this thing this is not a flashgame on newgrounds what the fuck is wrong with you”

“This transgender character that behaves like no actual trans person behaves is actually extremely offensively written and your attempts to deflect criticism by accusing your critics and detractors of transphobia and being the alt right are reductive and unhelpful”

“god can I please follow an indie game developer I liked on twitter without having to be held hostage by their bizarre meltdowns every week?”

what absolute idiots hear:

Part of writing a story with a political bent and doing it well is 1) not beating people over the head with it and 2) approaching it in a nuanced fashion.

Most of the writers on tumblr who think the last part are not capable of this.

I’m reminded of that post that floats around now and again where some bint complained about how she hated men because her story about a group of girls getting revenge on a rapist failed to incur instant sympathy from her creative writings teacher. Apparently, it was an example of the patriarchy keeping women writers down to be told that it’s not enough to bluntly tell someone “this character is an evil nazi and deserves to die” rather it has to be shown and furthermore shown in a fashion that isn’t approaching comical.

The Magic Words...

He let most of his children die in squalor while he wrote long-winded excuses for why he shouldn’t be expected to provide for them.

Before that he wasted his father’s money on liquor instead of making any effort during his education and then worked a string of odd jobs for short-lived newspapers. The man never had a real job in his life.

He was racist as shit even for the time. He hated black and Jewish people with a passion. His views on Jews were very similar to those of the Nazis.

People who knew him said he mocked and despised his followers as much as the “bourgeoisie” and felt superior to pretty much everyone. Gustav Techow said “personal domination is the end-all of his every activity”

Here’s a few examples from this article- http://www.theepochtimes.com/n3/2217122-karl-marx-the-racist/

“For example, in a July 1862 letter to Engels, in reference to his socialist political competitor, Ferdinand Lassalle, Marx wrote, “It is now completely clear to me that he, as is proved by his cranial formation and his hair, descends from the Negroes from Egypt, assuming that his mother or grandmother had not interbred with a n*****. Now this union of Judaism and Germanism with a basic Negro substance must produce a peculiar product. The obtrusiveness of the fellow is also n*****-like,” according to the book “Race and Racism in Modern Philosophy.”

Regarding Mexicans, during the Mexican-American War, he wrote: “Without violence, nothing is ever accomplished in history.” But then he asks, “Is it a misfortune that magnificent California was seized from the lazy Mexicans who did not know what to do with it?”

And Engels, the co-author of the famed (or infamous) “Manifesto of the Communist Party,” added: “In America, we have witnessed the conquest of Mexico and have rejoiced at it. It is to the interest of its own development that Mexico will be placed under the tutelage of the United States.”

Marx—whose grandparents were Jewish, but whose parents converted to Christianity—wasn’t a fan of his ancestral religion either, writing in his essay “On the Jewish Question”:

“What is the worldly religion of the Jew? Huckstering. What is his worldly God? Money . … Money is the jealous god of Israel, in face of which no other god may exist,” Marx wrote in the book—which critics have later described as virulently anti-Semitic.”“

Imagine evolving capsaicin specifically to stop mammals from eating your fruits, and then a mammal comes along that not only will eat your fruits, but likes them specifically because of the capsaicin, so much that it starts using its weird paws to distribute and care for your seeds, which turns into a strong selective force that literally starts evolving you into producing MORE capsaicin and makes you a WAY more successful and wider ranged species than you ever were before

Instead of, I don't know, EVOLVING TO BE FASTER, this animal finds a faster animal and sits on it. Which shouldn't even work because the faster animal is a prey animal and this animal is a predator, but SOMEHOW they FORM A SOCIAL BOND WITH THE PREY. So they can sit on it while it runs fast. And somehow the prey animal?? is cool with this?? and benefits from this relationship???

eat poison plants, decide they like getting poisoned, and evolve the plants to poison them more

evolve to not have hair, but they find mammals with thick fluffy hair and put the hair on themselves, and evolve the mammals to produce extra hair so they can both have a warm coat of hair

split up their parasitic lice species into two separate species because they start taking other animals' hair and putting it on themselves so much

learn how to set things on fire on purpose. maintain body temperature by just standing beside some wood that's on fire instead of literally any normal option

figure out that their prey tastes better and is easier to digest when they hold it over a fire after killing it. get smarter because they digest food so good after it's been held over a fire.

find a poisonous plant and try washing it in boiling water until they don't die when they eat it anymore

go across the ocean by making a floating nest despite not being able to breathe underwater, drink ocean water, or even swim naturally

drink milk from other mammals even though they can't digest it and it makes them sick. Evolve those mammals to produce more milk than their babies can drink so they can drink the milk. Some members of the species evolve to be able to digest milk because they were so hellbent on drinking it.

find flowers, bugs and minerals that are nice colors and crush them up to try to turn other things that color

Champagne is a wizard who sells bubbly alcohol.

It’s called English because of the original Lish people, all languages start with En here.

French fries are not potatoes they’re roots of the french plant.

Goodbye is now short for ‘good be your eye’ wishing you luck seeing the path ahead.