me robot

if i were a dude with a mustache i would be the coolest mf in town

i like it when people compliment me. i like it... when people like me. (looks around to make sure nobody is about to shoot me)

it is impossible to watch a movie. every night i think i want to watch a movie. no movie gets watched. because it's not possible

and yet they keep making movies with the hopes that one day humanity will discover a way to watch them. it's so inspiring

hey check this out *dies in front of you in every universe*

Yasss who else is a kinda lame aimless adult in they mid to late 20s

im not a girl Unless ☝️ im being told to go piss

i was abandoned as a baby & raised by a wild pack of cigarettes

*Looking at a gay couple* so which one of you is Colin Mochrie and which one is Ryan Styles

if i do something wrong they kill me