AMANI

bonus: he came from another iceberg

Bonus:

ilya rozanov asks shane to be his boyfriend, attempt 2: might fuck around later and marry a woman lol. yeah i have one in mind. she's really hot :) her dad was a goalie :)

No one is allowed entry untill and unless they can produce their very own certified robin-shaped identity card

Whenever someone with even a hint of supernatural powers in them arrives at Gotham, they're first met with Bruce standing at the city border with a notepad in hand

Bruce: State your name and purpose.

Kon: Kon-el, here to hangout!

Bruce: Your Robin?

Kon, flourishing Tim from behind him: Ta-Da!

Tim, waves: Hey Bruce

Bruce: Approved, you may enter

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bruce: Name and purpose?

Hal: Here to investigate a case, Hal Jordan

Bruce: Your Robin?

Hal: I.... don't have one?

Bruce: Denied

Hal: What?! But-

Bruce: Denied.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bruce: Yes, Wally, where's your robin?

Wally: Oh shit lemme just- *zaps away and returns with Dick, who was in the midst of brushing his teeth, in a bridal carry*- Here!

Bruce, grumbling a little: Fine. Approved.

Dick: You gotta stop using me as a key already, man

Wally: Blame Bruce.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bruce: Name and purpose?

Clark: Clark Kent, here for our monthly barbecue

Bruce: Robin?

Clark, producing an actual robin bird: Does this count?

the characters are damaged by the system- it took marks wife, it wore down/changed dylan, it isolated and traumatized irv, it constricted helena until they could be shaped to fit the system

Jason: He- wait, why did you?

Dick: Joker shot me in the shoulder.

Tim, scoffing: You wouldn't quit because of that, c'mon tell us the actual reason.

Dick: How would you kn- Oh yeah, your stalker years.

Tim: I wasn't a stalker

Dick: Keep telling yourself that.

Damian: Richard stop deflecting the question.

Dick:

Jason: Dick

Dick, sighing: Bruce got really upset and didn't want me getting hurt as Robin.

Tim: You wouldn't listen to that without a fight so do tell what else did he do to make you quit?

Damian, catching on: Did Father fire you?

Dick: He did it to keep me safe.

Tim: If he fired you, did he kick you out too?

Dick: I guess...

Damian: Richard was 17 at the time, was he not?

Jason: Roy mentioned you staying at his place once. Did Bruce not give you a place to stay?

Dick, getting increasingly nervous: I only spent a few nights, and I could make money perfectly fine.

Tim, growing pale: B didn't help you?

Dick: Don't worry, I don't think he'd do that to any of you.

Damian, appalled: I'm his blood son but what difference is there between you and Drake?

Dick: Well, I was going to age out in a couple months anyway.

Jason: Age out?

Tim, dread filling him: The articles only referred to him as B's ward.

Jason: Why are you mentioning that now, there's some more important things to be thinking about!

Damian: ...Was Richard not adopted?

Dick: I'm still here, y'know.

Damian: Apologies, but I require a proper response. Were you adopted?

Dick: I am now.

Everyone:

Jason: I'm murdering Bruce.

Tim, grinning: I have some alternatives in mind

Jason: Oh?

Damian: I shall sharpen my blades in preparation.