hey flower you're the chosen one

That moment where Nikki tells Bear that she's writing a love story that isn't a romance, and he doesn't get it. Can't recognize the difference between the two things, and the way it dooms them all. ugh. UGH. NOBODY TOUCH ME

i was thinking this and I've found somebody articulating it online

does anyone know what we are supposed to want

@isuggesteatingtherich

It be like that

I know he ate a seal

funniest thing to ever happen was when my boyfriend put on the first episode of columbo (which i'd never seen) but he wouldn't tell me what show it was he would only say "you'll get it when he shows up." but a fun fact about the first episode of columbo is that he doesn't show up for 32 minutes and when he does, he silently walks into the room with a cigar and does a little pose and goes "hi i'm columbo."

I think people would be less suicidal if they were allowed to talk about being suicidal without risk of being sent to the Torture Dungeon

“scientists don’t want you know” is a phrase that always cracks me up because if you actually meet a scientist they will be shaking and crying like an overstimulated chihuahua with the need to let you know